Band on the Run
by Mystical Light
Summary: Post 7x17 AU After a long hunt, the brothers manage a stop at the hospital where they'd left Castiel to visit. There, they discover that Meg is missing and Cas was transfered to a more secure facility. Something dark is vastly affecting the mind of their friend. What will they go through to get their angel back?
1. Prologue  Set Adrift

Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural. It is owned by many other people - not the least of which being the CW, it's creators, writers, actors, etc. I am doing this for no monetary gain.

Okay so here's the first chapter of something I've been working on for the last two weeks. I'm not quite sure how long this whole story is going to be but it's definitely AU after episode 7x17 though some elements may occur from the remaining season if they fit. I really want this to work out as I've been dying to do another multi-chapter story. I hope you enjoy what I offer. Here's Chapter 1 of 'We Carry On'

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><p>Dean could not wait to get back to their motel room, collapse on the bed and sleep for 18 hours straight. This last monster hunt had taken more than enough time and energy and they deserved the mother of all breaks for at least the next week and a half, if that.<p>

"I don't care what you say – we are taking a long vacation after this one."

"Yeah, sure Dean," Sam said with a grin and cocked his head, "after we stop the next apocalypse. Leviathans ring any bells?"

"Screw them - hey, we never got our Vegas week! I say we hit the road tomorrow and don't stop till I see one girl on the outskirts giving me her own personal… mmm "come hither" look." Dean demonstrated with an extended finger and seductive look in Sam's direction that the younger Winchester hoped to never see from his brother, facing him, ever again.

Sam chuckled and said nothing else. For the next hour of the ride though he gave his brother side-long glances until finally Dean spoke up.

"Okay, spill Sam, where do you want to go?"

Sam coughed and looked his brother in the eye. "We should stop in Indiana."

The car screeched to a halt which was safe as it was shortly after 3 am and Dean turned and gave his brother a dubious look.

"Come on Dean," Sam said, "I'm trying to be reasonable here. We've got a little free time, especially after this case and before another starts. We should make sure _everything _is _as we left it_."

A lot was left unsaid but Dean knew the point his brother was trying to not-so-subtly make. He sighed and nodded. "We're about a day and a half out. We'll leave tomorrow _after_ a long night's sleep."

"Fine."

"Good. Can we go now?"

Sam nodded and Dean put the car back into drive and went in the direction of their motel thinking, not only of rest, but of glazed blue eyes now too.

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><p>They left right after breakfast (which was well past noon but the diner they went to served breakfast all day for which Dean was most grateful) the next day and drove taking only a couple of breaks to eat or switch drivers as well as cars along the way.<p>

After another night's sleep in a motel on the outskirts of town, the boys dressed in their most presentable outfits and drove to _Northern Indiana State Hospital._ Dean and Sam walked side by side through the entrance and up to the pretty nurse behind the registration desk.

She was on the phone and held up a finger asking them to wait a moment. She wrote something down and looked back up at them again. "Can I help you?" she asked.

"We're here to see a cousin of ours who was admitted here last month," Sam said.

"Name?"

"Cas Smith."

The girl typed the name into the computer and shook her head. "I'm sorry but he's no longer a patient in this establishment."

Sam and Dean shared a significant look as Dean opened and closed his mouth a couple of times before finally asking, "What?"

"Mr. Smith was transferred to Oakdale Hospital a week ago. We called his emergency contact and they approved -"

"Honey," Dean said, leaning forward and pointing a thumb to himself and Sam, "we're his emergency contacts and believe me no one called."

"It says right here we talked to a 'Dean Smith'. Which one of you is Dean?"

"Me, the one you've been talking to this whole freakin' time."

"Well, I'm sorry sir but we contacted 'Dean Smith' and he said he was fine with the move."

Dean shared an incredulous look at his brother. "That's it? I say I didn't let my frie - cousin get moved and you just drop it? Where is he?"

"I told you, sir, he's in Oakdale - about an hour north. If you're finished I've got a lot of work to do."

"Oh I bet you do! Come on Sam we have to go fix this."

Dean was already half way to the door before Sam turned back to the nurse. "Is Nurse Masters scheduled today?"

"Oh, you know her? Nurse Masters didn't show up for the last six days. Some of us are working three times as hard filling in for her. Why?"

"No reason."

Sam followed his brother out the door and once they reached their car Dean scrubbed his face with his hand.

"This doesn't look good," Sam said.

"You think?"

Without saying a word both boys got into the car, Dean started it and they left in search of their missing and, sadly, mad friend.

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><p>Thanks for reading. Please leave me a review and I'll reply as soon as I am able. I'm going to do a chapter a week so the next chapter should be ready to upload soon.<p> 


	2. Oakdale

Disclaimer: Supernatural is still not mine at all.

Thanks for reading and for reviewing/alerting. As you can see right off the bat - I changed the title. As much as I loved the original, this was my second choice and I felt like it fit just a little better (especially when it comes to the lyrics) so I'll save 'We Carry On' for something at a later date. As you might guess, I know nothing about the medical field so this was all put together by watching tv shows and a little research. Sorry if I messed anything up. Okay - here's the next chapter. Enjoy.

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><p>The ride was tense and silent. Sam was sure his brother was breaking the speed limit by twenty but he wasn't about to call him on it. After all, this was definitely an emergency. They arrived at Oakdale in half an hour, parked in the surprisingly small lot and rang the buzzer when they reached the door. Sam looked up and up. The building was huge; at least five stories, and looked like it was built in the last ten years or so making it appear fairly modern. Dean had no time to observe the facility though. He just wanted some straight answers.<p>

"Welcome to Oakdale; do you have an appointment?" a female voice asked from a speaker that was as high as Dean's stomach. Did only women work these messenger jobs at hospitals?

Leaning over, Dean looked at his brother dubiously and said, "Um, no."

A minute later the voice came back, saying, "Could you please push the speaker button? I don't know what you're saying."

Dean rolled his eyes to Sam and groaned, hitting the button and saying they weren't scheduled to visit.

"I'm sorry then, but I can't allow you entry. Visiting hours ended today at 1."

"But it's only 2:30. Still plenty of daytime left…"

"Who're you here to see?"

"Cas Smith - he was sent here from _Northern Indiana_."

There was a longer pause this time and the two Winchesters were unsure of whether this was a good thing or not.

"I'm sorry but you're going to have to come again tomorrow. Have a nice day."

"Have a nice - have a nice -"

"All right Dean, we'd better go. It's obvious we can't get in now," Sam said, trying to placate his worried brother.

Dean shook his head as he turned. "This is too hinkey Sam! Way too hinkey!"

Sam dragged his brother away by the arm. "I know, Dean. Look - let's get a room in town, call the place, find out the hours to visit _tomorrow_ and come back then. It looks like a nice place - Cas is probably fine."

Dean looked ready to protest again but stopped himself and walked off. It was a long afternoon in the quiet town where a casual perusal of local newspapers to search for anything resembling a case turned up nothing and the most interesting story was about the recent local pie festival ("We're so coming back again next year, Sam."). That night while Sam was asleep, Dean stayed up at the laptop looking up any and all information about Oakdale. When that reached a dead end (everything pointed to it being just another recovery center), he turned his sights back to whatever Dick was up to.

The next morning, Sam woke for his run to find Dean asleep at the table and a small puddle of drool just barely reaching the computer. Sam moved the computer away, lightly gave Dean a pat on the shoulder and left.

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><p>The boys ate a quick breakfast of donuts and coffee and took off for the center for "Castiel Visit Attempt Number Two."<p>

"We're here to see Cas Smith - we made an appointment this time," Dean said, into the speaker.

There was a silent crackling on the other side of the line before a man's voice said, "I'm sorry but Mr. Smith isn't taking visitors today."

Dean barely restrained himself from punching the speaker and instead Sam pushed the button and asked why.

The man explained, "Mr. Smith was brought to our closed ward after an episode."

"Bull-" Dean started to say before Sam put a hand over his mouth.

"H-how long's he going to be there for?" Sam asked while Dean shoved the hand out of his way.

"It depends. Could be days. Could be weeks."

"And we can't even check in on him?"

Silence again.

"Please sir – we're family."

After a minute, the door buzzed and Dean moved past his brother and pushed the door open using an unnecessary amount of force and caused the door to smack against the wall. The brothers walked up to the front desk where a man in a white lab coat stood. He was a few inches shorter than Dean and appeared to be somewhere in his mid to late fifties.

"I'm Dr. Remi and I'm the chief of medicine and also the main physician to your…cousin. Let's step into my office and we can talk more there."

Sam and Dean followed behind the man and took in the place. White was the first word that came to Dean's head. Sterile. The hallway they walked through was full of plain closed doors though a few were open too. Some of the patients were sleeping within; others reading or just staring. They also passed what appeared to be a common room where, at a far table, some patients appeared to be painting. The doctor opened his office door and allowed the Winchesters through first before following.

"So boys," the doctor said walking around his desk and taking a seat.

"So Doctor Remi," Dean said, following suit and sitting, "why can't we see Cas?"

Doctor Remi looked through his desk drawers as Sam sat. "It was a little thing, almost completely unnoticeable really," the doctor started conversationally, "except it was something that lasted for the whole day. You see, yesterday, Mr. Smith fell into a catatonic state..."

"Ca-catatonic?" Dean asked worriedly.

"Yes - while your friend, I'm sorry, _cousin_, has fantastic stamina, it wasn't until yesterday evening that we realized _Cas_ hadn't moved at all and stared across his bed for the entire day_._ And when we entered near 9 pm he continued to stare, muttering the same word over and over again."

"What word?" Sam asked, giving his brother a look.

Doctor Remi flipped through the pages of a file and looked up at them saying, "Morningstar. Does that bare any significance to either of you?"

"Um, kind of," Dean said nervously.

"Well, we know that while at _Northern_ he was diagnosed with schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. Since he arrived we've also added post-traumatic stress disorder and severe depression as well."

"I see," Dean murmured.

The doctor put his hands together on his desk and leaned forward. "We don't have much of a history on file and we've been searching. Your cousin- was he a soldier?"

"You-you might say that."

"We've had the sort before – just wanted to check before moving forward. Well, that would likely explain his drawings."

"Drawings?" Sam asked, leaning his elbows against his knees.

"Yes," Remi said, rummaging through the file and handing some papers to Dean who had reached for them. Sam looked over his shoulder and they stared. Page after page of pictures with rings of fire and bodies lying on a green field (and all of them with black wings at their sides). Enochian sigils covered another sheet from top to bottom. Faces stared at them, almost too lifelike to have been drawn with only colored pencils: Bobby, Ellen and Jo, Rachel, Balthazar and the final which pictured two lifeless, plaid shirted men lying in pools of deep red blood.

"Wow," was all Dean could say when he handed the pictures back and Sam could only shake his head in worry and despair.

"When his condition improves, we'll move him out of his current ward and back with our other patients. How long will you boys be in town?"

"Um, till next week probably," Dean said leaning forward and putting his head in his hands.

Suddenly, something banged loudly on the floor above. Everyone simultaneously looked up but Remi assured them it was nothing. He left the room quickly though, leaving the brothers alone. Dean waited until he was sure the man was down the hall before getting up and walking around to the other side of the desk and peeking at the file. Sam heard the loud hiss of the heater turn on as he stood to join him.

"Anything we need to know?" Sam asked.

Dean coughed deeply before turning the pages. The words blurred together and he blinked a few times but it wasn't helping. Something was very wrong. There was a loud thump behind him and Dean turned only to collapse on top of his already unconscious brother.

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><p>There was a bright light shining behind his eyelids but Dean didn't have the strength to open his eyes just yet. Distantly he heard someone saying his name and he knew that he had to respond eventually.<p>

"Wake up."

Was that a woman's voice?

"_Deano_ we gotta get out of here - get up!"

Deano? Oh crap. Dean opened his eyes and leaning over him under the only light in the room was Meg the demon/nurse. "Meg?"

"Oh good, the general's roused. Sammy - get over here."

Sam walked over and helped Dean up on both feet. Then almost immediately Dean rounded on Meg and pushed her against the closest wall, Sam an inch or two behind.

"We had a deal. What happened?" Dean asked through clenched teeth.

"Oo, easy big boy."

"Meg," Dean said sternly.

Meg rolled her eyes to the floor and then up to meet his again. "Angels, Dean."

Dean eased up and took a step back. "What?"

"Angels… they finally found Clarence."

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><p>Hope you're still interested. Thanks very much for reading.<p> 


	3. Right on the Edge

Disclaimer: Still do not own Supernatural

Thanks for reading the last chapter, I hope you liked it. Here's the newest one. Castiel has finally arrived to the party. Enjoy. :)

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><p>After several long seconds of tense silence, Dean couldn't take the quiet anymore. "Care to elaborate?"<p>

"I don't know; can you let go of me?"

Dean dropped his hands from the demon's shoulders and Meg relaxed, looking at the boys and taking them in. "You boys are looking good," she said while thumbing Sam's jacket and looking up to give him a saucy wink.

"Speak or I'm gonna get stabby," Dean said, fingering the demon knife in his belt loop.

"Well that wouldn't help anyone now would it?" she asked, stepping away. She faced the wall and shook her head before turning back and talking. "I went in for my shift like a good little human civilian and when I stopped by Clarence's room there was some other guy sitting on his bed. I inquired and the head nurse said he got transferred. I asked to where and after letting slip I was worried about him they told me he got sent to Oakdale."

Sam shared a look with his brother before asking, "And?"

"And," she said, deliberately holding out, "I waited. During my break I high tailed it out of town, got on the freeway and came straight here. Got caught at the front door. Was knocked out and I've been here ever since. Would've tried the door but their juice is keeping me trapped in here. And now you two boneheads are locked in here with me too. Nice job."

"Shut up Meg."

"No but what I really, _really_ want to know boys," Meg said while poking Dean in the chest, "is why did it take you a _whole week_ to find out Castiel wasn't where you left him, hmm? Now-if it was your poor tainted, broken baby brother-"

Dean went up in her face again and pushed her into the nearest hard wall. "I said ."

Meg pushed away from Dean and he turned to face his brother.

"We knew he couldn't stay hidden forever, Dean," Sam said with the shake of his head. "Dean, you'd better not be blaming yourself for this! Dean?"

And yet Dean couldn't help it - it was his idea to leave Cas behind but that was only because he had no idea what to do to help him, especially when he was practically catatonic when they left him!

"Ok, we've gotta get out of here first and then we'll see about taking him somewhere safe. Even if we have to build our own panic room, we'll get Cas somewhere and away from this idiot."

"Hey!"

Dean ignored Meg this time and tried to come up with a reasonable plan. _Any_ reasonable plan.

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><p>Doctor Remi entered his patient's room and closed the door behind him with a quiet click. The patient sat in the dead center of the clean bed. His legs were splayed in front of him, hands crossed in his lap and he stared at the far wall not blinking. His blue eyes were completely unfocused and his mouth moved in silent conversation with an unseen force that seemed to be standing before him.<p>

Leaning in, the doctor could hear words spoken in a language no mortal human would recognize. He recognized them though as a begging plea. Bringing his mouth to the man's ear, the doctor whispered scornfully, "We have you now, _General_."

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><p>After searching the room, every corner and every shelf, they finally managed to find one paperclip that wasn't completely rusted and useless. Dean was able to manipulate the thing and get started jimmying the lock on the door open.<p>

After a minute and forty seconds, the door opened and everyone was free. Almost everyone.

"Move the salt line asshole."

"Why?" Dean asked while his brother looked both ways down the hall.

"Dean," Sam said, clearly not wanting to get into this while Cas was in danger. Again.

Meg, meanwhile, glared. "Listen to your brother, boy," she said in a low tone.

Dean took a deep breath in through his nose and used his foot to make a clean break. Meg daintily stepped outside and together the three of them ran to the staircase and up.

"You know where the closed ward is?" Dean asked as he moved around a sharp corner.

"Fifth floor," Meg answered between pants of breath. "I can smell angel filth from here."

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><p>"Ezekiel," Castiel whispered after a moment. He turned his head towards the doctor and shifted off the bed.<p>

"Imagine my surprise at finding you here - in a place like this. Well, we always knew you were an odd one, running with humans and demons alike. And look at you've been reduced to now. I know what you're seeing; what you're hearing. I can feel it – running through your grace."

Castiel frowned and looked away. He fidgeted ever so slightly and that was a giveaway to his current state.

"I want it to stop Ezekiel," he whispered, desperately. "Make _him_ stop."

Out of thin air an angel sword appeared in the other angel's hand.

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><p>The Winchesters and Meg finally reached the fifth floor and ran down the hall, searching the rooms.<p>

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><p>"I'm doing this for you Brother. For all of us."<p>

"I understand. _Please_."

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><p>Dean glanced in a few rooms and finally found Doctor Remi standing over a patient's bed. He was holding a long, pointed, familiar-looking knife. Not thinking, Dean threw open the door and the Doctor turned.<p>

"Winchester," Doctor Remi growled.

Another voice piped in at the same time, questioning shakily, "Dean?"

"Cas." There the angel sat, on his bed, still wearing the same white shirt, pants and shoes of a facility patient.

Dean walked further into the room and the door slammed shut behind him. The doctor, no, angel, ran towards Dean and the hunter just managed to get out of the way before the angel sword entered his own chest. They circled the room and Dean managed to avoid him at every turn.

"You must not stop me human," Remi said. "We must sever the link."

Dean spared Castiel another glance before the door flew open again and Sam and Meg burst inside.

"Dean!"

"Sam!"

In the midst of the confusion, the knife suddenly flew out of Doctor Remi's hand and across the floor to stop before Dean's feet. Not thinking, he grabbed the knife in his right hand, ran the short distance and stabbed the doctor/angel right in the chest.

Light erupted from behind human skin and Ezekiel the angel and Doctor Remi were dead before they hit the ground.

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><p>Thanks very much for reading. Another chapter to come in a week. Reviews will be kindly appreciated - they help make Castiel feel better. ;)<p> 


	4. Never seeing no one

Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural - the CW does.

Thank you for continuing to read this story. You have no idea how much I appreciate it. Here is the next chapter and I hope you enjoy it. We've got a slight cliffhangery ending here (just to warn you)

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><p>The room was silent for a few more seconds before Dean put the sword in his belt loop and, moving as one, grabbed Castiel at the same time as Sam. A second too late the Winchesters noticed the leather bands around Castiel's wrists, binding him as though handcuffed.<p>

"Can't you just mojo them off yourself," Dean asked while undoing the buckle of the one.

Stoic as ever, Castiel answered, "I chose not to for the safety of everyone in the facility."

Dean could tell his brother was looking at him but he ignored it and got Cas' arm free while Sam did the same with the other arm band. Castiel allowed them to do this without protest. The angel was a bit too pliant and looked more exhausted than usual.

When Sam's gigantic body moved out of the way, Castiel finally saw that there was another person in the room besides the brothers to save him.

"Hey Clarence. Miss me?" Meg said with a flirty wave and a barely contained grin.

Castiel briefly looked as though a shadow of something clouded his face but a second later it was gone. "Please do not tell me," Castiel murmured instead, "that..._she_ is going to continue to act as my guardian?"

"Who? Her?" Dean asked, pointing his thumb in the demon's direction. "Nah, she's done for now."

Sam uneasily met the demon's eyes and could feel the waves of anger radiating off of her. "Dean..."

"No, leave her for Crowley to deal with."

"Dean."

"You ass!"

Dean chuckled and patted the angel on the shoulder. He stopped the second Castiel flinched. "Sorry but she'll have to stay with us for a bit longer."

Meg sighed in relief.

"Then we'll kick her out and stock up on the salt."

Meg snorted. "Nice, now can we _please_ go? Preferably before something else shows up to stop us."

"Hold your horses."

Dean was slowly able to pull Castiel to stand upright on two feet though the angel did ever so slightly wobble. Sam, Dean and Meg walked past the body of the other dead angel and to the door. When Dean turned back, Cas was still right where they left him, his hands now firmly wrapped around his stomach.

"Cas - you gonna be sick? We've got to move!"

"I...I'm..." The angel's eyes searched the empty room, stopping at the body lying on the ground. Cas' hands rose to the crown of his head and he fell to his knees, body bowed and his eyes shut in agony. He began to whimper like a newborn pup.

"Cas what's wrong?" Dean asked, moving forward. He was just about to put a hand on his friend's shoulder again when Meg stopped him.

Sam crossed his arms. "What're you going to do?" he asked, intrigued.

Instead of answering, Meg moved to Castiel's other side and reluctantly Dean stepped away. Meg rubbed small circles on Castiel's back and hummed something quietly under her breath. It took an extra five minutes but eventually Cas woke up, shook his head, and slowly with Meg's help stood at the ready.

Dean was almost speechless. "Wasn't that Carr-...?"

"Nononononono. No. Let's go," Meg said, shaking her finger in his face.

Meg stormed past all of them and out the door making her footsteps as loud as possible. Sam went next and Dean made sure Cas followed before they all disappeared into the night.

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><p>About an hour later, Dean pulled the truck they were using into the parking spot right outside their motel room door and killed the engine. His brother had the nerve to fall asleep and Dean turned to see Castiel staring at something outside the front windshield and Meg silently watching him. Dean got out of the car and walked around to Meg's door.<p>

"We're here. Check into your own room and we'll...I'll take Cas inside to ours."

"Oh I don't think so, Deano," Meg said getting out after him.

Dean turned back, rolled his eyes to the sky, and crossed his arms. "Oh really?"

"Well tell me, Dean - have you spent weeks with a psychotic angel? You know, apart from when he claimed to be God? Oh wait, I forgot, you sort of ignored him then too."

Dean had to force himself to not exorcise the demon possessing a poor defenseless girl. Damn it, they still needed her. "Fine. Fine - you and Cas can get your own room together. Just try to get one near us, okay?"

"Depends on the manager but I'll give it my best shot."

"Separate beds!" he shouted after her.

Meg left and Dean sighed loudly before bending over and staring into the car. The dark circles under Cas' eyes had him worried. He foolishly wished the angel took short naps during the day but, with the Winchester's already well versed in the matter; no sleep was to be had at all with the devil running amok in your custard.

Meg returned ten minutes later twirling her room key on her finger and together she and Dean got Cas out of the car and onto his own motel room bed. He sat without protest and returned to saying nothing at all.

"He's down for the count tonight. Shouldn't be too bad," Meg said with a sigh.

"Well, if anything happens tonight, come and get us. We're two doors down."

"Whatever," Meg said, pushing him out of the room and shutting the door in Dean's face.

Dean went back to the truck, grabbed Sam's and his bags, and smacked his brother on the shoulder to wake him up.

"Come on Sleeping Beauty - get inside and get to sleep. Don't want a stiff neck in the morning."

Grumbling as he went, Sam followed his brother to their room. Once inside he collapsed onto his bed without even removing his shoes first. Dean only sighed and went to the bathroom to brush his teeth before going to sleep himself.

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><p><em>Dean stood over the body of Dick Roman, gun in hand and took another shot. The head shattered spraying black blood all over the clean floor of his twenty-two floors up office in some nondescript building.<em>

_Knock knock_

Dean rolled over and snorted into his pillow. The knock on the door became louder and, groaning, Dean got up and looked through the tiny peephole. It was still dark outside but he would see those blue eyes from fifty feet away. He opened the door and standing over the threshold was Castiel, still wearing his white patient clothes and looking all around disheveled.

"Caswazgoinon?" Dean asked through a yawn while leaning against the door.

Castiel looked over Dean's shoulder and saw Sam fast asleep and turning over.

"May I come in?" the angel asked and Dean nodded and stepped aside.

"Where's Meg?"

"She is watching a film about female bullying in public high schools. She found it most enjoyable and I became tired of pretending to follow its asinine plot."

"Right. Whatever. Well we were only just sleeping for once."

Castiel frowned and looked to the floor. "...Perhaps I should return when you are both awake and rested…."

"Cas, its fine," Dean said, rolling his eyes. "Come in and try not to make too much noise."

Castiel walked into the motel room, side stepping nothing while he stared at the far wall. Dean sighed before shutting the door and locking it.

Castiel had already taken a seat at the small table in the corner and Dean grabbed something from his bag and joined him.

"You up for some cards?"

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><p>Sam wasn't sure what exactly woke him up when he finally opened his eyes. He looked at the clock beside their beds and the red numbers screamed 4:30. Based on the darkness, it was definitely still early in the morning too. He didn't know why he was so tired before but he fell into a deep sleep that was very hard to push away.<p>

There were muffled voices coming from across the room. He turned his head and stared; at the small rickety table, in two too small wooden chairs, sat his brother and Castiel playing…poker? The curtains were open and moonlight was shining through. Castiel was sitting more stiff than usual and Dean looked utterly exhausted. And standing just behind Castiel, with his hands on the angel's shoulders, was Lucifer himself.

Sam wanted to breathe, scream, shout – something. But he couldn't. He was frozen and staring.

The fallen angel turned his head to face Sam. He smiled widely and even gave him a cheerful wave. "Hey bunk buddy – long time no see!"

Castiel looked to Sam with wide, frightened eyes and both of them felt the air in the room become much, much colder as Lucifer began to laugh.

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><p>Dun dun dun! Thanks very much for reading. Let me know what you think. Have a nice week!<p> 


	5. Like You

Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural - it is owned by others.

It's Thursday and that means new chapter day! Sorry about the cliffhanger last time. Thankfully there isn't one here. Thank you to those of you who reviewed and put this on alerts and fav list. You guys keep me going.

So, Lucifer's around. I'll let you guys read now and stop talking. Enjoy.

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><p>Dean looked up from his cards and realized his brother was awake when his large body scrambled out of his bed and to the farthest corner of the room as if he was four years old again and afraid of the dark. "Sammy, what's wrong?" he questioned uneasily.<p>

"Lu-Lucifer. He's…he's…" Sam couldn't complete the sentence as he lowered his head to his knees becoming a human ball (the heat! Oh god – how it burned! Makeitstopmakeitstop!) and began moaning, sounding agonized and in pain.

Dean's eyes widened. No - not again! "Sam," Dean again asked, rising and coming towards him.

Sam's eyes met his brother's in the dark and he pointed wordlessly to Castiel. Dean looked but he only saw the angel and Castiel appeared to be visibly upset. Castiel looked to the exact spot where Sam pointed and rose from his seat, shut his eyes and concentrated very hard on something, scrunching up his face, looking about ready to burst a blood vessel.

Dean was ready to throttle the angel. "Cas enough with the pooping face; we've got a crisis here!"

To Sam's eyes though, the form of Lucifer became translucent and the fallen angel slowly disappeared, giving Sam a wave as he went. Castiel opened his eyes and stumbled slightly as Dean attempted to get Sam's breathing back to normal while awkwardly hugging his brother's shoulders. Dean looked again over to Castiel, bathed in the moonlight of the open curtained window; the angel looked utterly worn down.

Dean turned his head between his brother and his angel in exasperation. "Well? Could someone tell me what the hell just happened?"

Sam was about ready to say something but, well, he wasn't entirely sure about what happened himself. He looked down at his hands and everything…was okay."I think, I think I was just seeing things. Must've been a dream – you know, one of the one's between waking up and being asleep. Nothing to worry about Dean - right Cas?"

Dean then looked at Castiel and the angel merely shrugged before slowly letting out a deep, drawn out yawn. "Tired, Cas?" Dean asked confusedly.

"I don't...I don't..." Castiel yawned once more, loud and wide.

Dean wasn't completely sure but deep in his heart he knew,_ he knew,_ that something about Cas being in the room had triggered a hell-flashback for his brother and that was very much **not** okay. "Our game can wait, Cas; you should probably get back to your room to sleep and tomorrow-"

Sam thought that was a bit unreasonable. He got a good look at Castiel and the angel looked about ready collapse right where he stood."Dean, Cas doesn't need to go anywhere; he can stay here -"

"He's going back to Meg," Dean snapped back, turning to face his brother and then back to Castiel. Deep breath in, deep breath out. "No offense Cas but you'd probably be safer with her than with us right now. Angels would expect you to be with us and not bunking with a demon."

"Of course," Castiel said, nodding and walking towards the door. Sam thought he sounded a little disappointed. "Good night."

"Good night," Sam said quietly.

Dean nodded."Night." Once Cas was out the door, Dean locked the door and sighed before jumping stomach first onto his bed. "Night Sam - turn off the light."

Sam's eyebrow rose to his hairline. He wasn't finished yet. "Dean, aren't we going to talk about this?"

"About what?" Dean asked, while fluffing his pillow. It remained disappointingly flat and he glared at it.

"Don't play stupid with me Dean; you know what I'm talking about. About Cas."

"What about Cas?"

Sam rolled his eyes. "Dean, we agreed…"

"Yeah to help him. But no, I can't Sam - not yet. I can't completely forgive him yet."

"I'm not saying that. Look, what Cas did was immensely stupid..."

"Understatement."

"But now he's paying for it with his sanity. Dean - he might have _broken_ my wall, but when he figured out something to help me, to help _you_, he decided to transfer the crazy to .head. Do you know how many people would do that? With his abilities?"

"Well I didn't tell him to do it!" Dean said, raising his voice.

"That's right, you didn't. Cas did it, thought of it all on his own and why?" Sam said, trying to be the voice of reason. "Because he knows he did us wrong before and he wanted to fix it. And where do you think he learned all about sacrificing himself for someone else - Zachariah? Crowley? No - it was us." Time for the big guns now. "Dean, Cas is like -"

"No," Dean said, shaking his head, not wanting to hear...

"Our brother," Sam ploughed on. "We already lost one brother to hell Dean; do you really want to lose another?"

Dean was silent for a long time. "Him being here, in this room, almost brought back your hell-vision in full Technicolor and Surround sound. Now he's _gone_ and _you're fine_. We'll talk about this in the morning now drop it and go back to sleep Sam! We have things to do later."

"Things?"

"Things. Bed."

Dean turned around to face the wall and buried his head deeper into his pillow, refusing to say anything else. Sam wanted to keep going but he couldn't. Not with his brother acting like a stubborn ass. They both knew the other would be awake and thinking until morning.

* * *

><p>Just after 8 o'clock, Meg stormed into their room and asked that they leave for breakfast soon. "If I don't get his pills in him soon then it'll be a longer trip than we'd all like."<p>

Sam was tying his boot laces but stopped. "Wait, pills?" he asked, looking up.

"Well in case you didn't know, and I know you didn't, Clarence _is_ on meds and I've still got some from Northern I on me. Can we get a move on, princesses?"

Dean came out of the bathroom from brushing his teeth and Sam looked up at him and shrugged.

"He also kinda needs a change of clothes. I don't think patrons will take too kindly to a guy wearing crazy hospital attire."

Dean nodded to Sam and he rummaged through Dean's bag trying to find something clean that would fit Castiel. Sam handed off to her a plain flannel button down and jeans and she left.

"Be done in five," Dean said. "Go out to the truck and I'll meet you."

Sam looked at his brother one more time and said nothing else as he left. Dean exited the motel after a few minutes and walked to the driver's side door without looking anyone in the eye and climbed in. Sam unlocked the doors of the backseats and climbed into the passenger's side seat. As everyone was getting settled, Dean took a quick look into the backseat and Meg was helping Castiel with his seatbelt. Cas was looking a bit more pale than normal... He kept looking over Meg's shoulder, then examining the car's interior and how long had he had that twitch? No, scratch that - why was Castiel twitching?

"I think I saw a diner up the road when we got into town," Sam muttered. He knew what Dean was seeing but he wasn't about to call him on it. Dean nodded and put the car into reverse and then into drive as he brought them in search of a little breakfast.

The Lake Side Diner (nowhere near a lake) was open and surprisingly pretty clean. Dean ordered the 'Hungry Man Breakfast' while Sam ordered a waffle. Meg ordered an omelet for herself and a plate of pancakes for Castiel.

"And can you bring him a large cup of water with his chocolate milk?" Meg asked, nudging her head in the angel's direction.

"And a water for your brother. Got it," the waitress said, leaving before she could see the Winchester's shocked and Meg's annoyed reactions. Castiel didn't really react at all; he just looked down at his hands folded on the table and stared at them. When he finally moved it was to take a greedy sip of milk that left the glass half empty.

"So what's our game plan going to be?" Dean asked after taking a sip of coffee.

"Cas is going to be a little drowsy for a few hours after his medicine but he'll be pliable," Meg said, her own hands wrapped around her cup of tea. "We get out of town and go somewhere, anywhere but definitely out of Indiana."

"Agreed," both Winchesters said while nodding.

Their food arrived a few minutes later and Meg cut up Castiel's pancakes for him before digging into her own food. Dean watched as Castiel lifted a shaky hand and gently began to place his food into his mouth before beginning his own meal.

When they were finished and Cas had taken a few of the pills Meg had in her possession, they returned to the motel to pick up the rest of their belongings and check out. They all piled into the truck and Castiel dozed off into a light sleep. Everyone stayed quiet (including Meg).

* * *

><p>Okay, I hope I didn't make anyone angry with Sam's and Dean's bit in the middle. Sam's slightly more ready to forgive but Dean's still got a ways to go. I tried to make the dialogue as real to show as I could.<p>

Next chapter will be up in a week and we'll finally get to see a bit into Castiel's mind. See you then. :)


	6. Stuck Inside These Four Walls

Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural, the Simpsons or Sbaro pizza which are all mentioned here. They are owned by many others and I am making no money for having written this.

Wow, guys. I'm so glad you're enjoying the story thus far. Today we're finally getting to the meat of the story and our first look into Castiel's mind and problems. Enjoy.

* * *

><p>In his many millennia of being alive there was only one place in Castiel's mind that had slowly become <em>Home<em> and that was the eternal Tuesday afternoon in a beautiful park on a summer day in Rome, 1953. It was where he would go to think, to reflect and take a moment to just breathe. After being cut off from it for so long during the "Apocalypse that Never Was", when Castiel finally returned, he had almost forgotten what even the flowers there smelled like. Even inside of his own mind as he was right now, Castiel was able to recreate the same cloud pattern that passed along the bright blue sky, the feel of the springy green grass beneath his feet.

Castiel arrived at his favored tall oak tree and took a seat under the shade. He relaxed, closed his eyes and thought back to what had happened this past night.

It was a slip-up, an oversight, that Lucifer was visible for the few seconds Sam had sensed him. Castiel hadn't meant for it to happen but usually a second was all the devil needed.

"Oh, Castiel, you're hurting me," someone said from beside him.

Castiel warily turned but didn't say anything, taking in the form of his fallen brother. Most humans cannot comprehend an angel's true form and, during his initial examination of Sam's psyche in the hospital, he observed that Sam was still seeing Lucifer as Nick. Having taken on Sam's problems for himself, Castiel often didn't have that luxury - not that he deserved it of course.

"Castiel...Castiel, _look at me!_"

Then there were the truly bad times when Lucifer appeared in neither his true form, or has stolen one. No, the worst was when Lucifer appeared to Castiel as the deceased, the ones he'd wronged. That was why Rachel, his former Lieutenant and confidant, was looking him square in the eye - looking hurt and angry and full of what Castiel slowly interpreted as_ lust_.

"Rachel" reached out and wrapped her hand around the back of Castiel's head and pulled him in closer to her as if she were being intimate (inappropriate) with him. Initially Castiel tried to move away but "Rachel" felt so real! Even her grace was so alive! So...

"Cas. Castiel, wake up."

Castiel jerked awake and his left arm smacked against something soft.

"Damn it Clarence - that's my face."

He was out of the beauty of Heaven and back in their moving automobile once again.

"Apologies," he said to the demon without actually meaning it.

"Everything all right back there?" Dean asked, his green eyes staring into Cas'.

"Yeah Cas," Lucifer said to his left, still in Rachel's form. "Are you all right? I know the truth," (s)he sing-songed.

Castiel looked down at his hands in his lap and sighed. "I am adequate. How long was I...?"

"Unconscious? 'Bout an hour, give or take. Look, we're headed to Montana so it's going to be awhile. If you want to go back to sleep I promise we'll stay quiet. No talking. No radio. No…"

"Why are we driving to Montana?"

"New home base after the big mouths torched Bobby's."

"Bobby knows of our arrival?"

Castiel noticed the sad look Sam gave his brother and after a few seconds Dean sighed and said, "He's gone, Cas."

"Gone?"

"Yeah he...died, a few months ago," Sam said, slowly.

"I was wondering why old Krusty wasn't with you two clowns," Meg said unsympathetically while examining her fingernails, biting one on the corner. Sam flinched and Dean turned around to give her the stink eye.

"I'm...very sorry. He was a good man," Castiel acknowledged.

"Thanks, Cas," Sam said.

"How'd he go?" Meg asked.

Sam looked ready to say something but Dean beat him to it. "Leviathans got him. The Leader, Dick, shot him in the head. It was touch and go but, in the end…can't fight fate."

Castiel felt deep inside what he had heard referred to as his stomach "dropping". Suddenly the pancakes, still lying in his stomach, felt like they wanted to exit imminently through his mouth but he swallowed it down.

"I see," Meg said. "Can't say I've had the pleasure of running into one of _those_ yet."

"Be grateful. They're all nasty, tricky shape-shifting bastards," Sam said, turning to Meg.

He sent a last, fleeting glance at Castiel but after that the group returned to quiet.

"See Cassie," a voice said to Castiel's left. This time it was male and British... "See what your little crusade did," Lucifer, in Balthazar's form, said with a smirk. "You just keep hurting these boys. Give it up Castiel - give in."

"No," Castiel muttered, looking anywhere but at the other angel.

"You say something, Cas?" Dean asked.

Castiel looked but Lucifer was gone. "No...Nothing..."

* * *

><p>Sam begged his brother to stop for a few minutes so he could stretch his cramping legs. After thirty miles of complaints, Dean finally obliged and gave all of them a blanket twenty minutes at a rest stop off the highway to do whatever they wanted before they needed to leave. Castiel walked into a restroom to wash his hands and face. He claimed that he was fine. The argument about it with Dean had been short and pointless.<p>

_"I do not need a keeper. I am still an angel of -" _

_"Yeah, just don't take too long. We've gotta book it. We're only a few hours in and Montana ain't exactly close to Indiana." _

Castiel liberally squirted soap on his hands and ran them under the warm water. Once the soap was gone, Castiel cupped his hands under the running faucet and poured the water on his face. The water felt good and made him feel a little better and more refreshed. He looked into the mirror over the sink and staring back at him was himself. Well, Jimmy Novak's face anyway. He grabbed a paper towel to dry off. As he turned back to the mirror again, his eyes suddenly flickered from Novak's blue to a sinister glowing midnight shade that swallowed the iris and pupil completely. Castiel couldn't help the gasp that escaped his lips as he stumbled back.

"Now, I don't know about you brother…."

Castiel turned and Lucifer (in Nick's form) was right behind him, doubled over in glee.

"But I think I'm starting to have a real positive influence on you."

Lucifer laughed again, harder and then the sound died out.

"No," Castiel growled, trying to reign in his anger and fear.

"I mean the Cage's power _mixing in_ with your grace? You shouldn't have taken those little day trips to hell otherwise you'd probably be fine with Sam's little wall problems – i.e., me." Lucifer walked closer to Castiel until he was right in the weaker angel's face. "Hellfire is running all through your body, turning your grace dark as night, and there's not a damn thing you can do -"

"**No**," Castiel cried out and, this time, the lights in the restroom exploded in a shower of bright sparks.

* * *

><p>Dean was standing at the pizza counter buying a slice when the power in the building flickered and then died. The other patrons groaned but when Dean looked up to see his brother staring at him, something clicked and they both ran.<p>

"Hey, Dude - your pizza!"

"Don't want it," Dean shouted over his shoulder at the overworked Sbaro employee.

Sam reached the men's room door first and ran inside. Dean followed him a second or two behind and stopped at the door. In the farthest corner, Castiel was sitting under an overflowing sink, his knees tucked under his chin and his arms wrapped around them. Sam and Dean shared a look and slowly they walked towards the frightened angel.

After shutting off the water, Dean gruffly asked, "Cas, you okay?"

Dean leaned his back against the wall near to him and crossed his arms. Sam meanwhile crouched in front of the angel and moved to put a hand on his shoulder when he heard whispering. He looked to his brother and Dean slid down the wall until he was next to Castiel, on the angel's left hand side.

"Cas, you saying something?"

They leaned in closer and tried to hear. A gravelly whisper spoke five words in a prayerful mantra.

"Mygraceismyownmygraceis..."

Absorbing that, Dean carefully put a hand to Castiel's shoulder and pulled him against his chest and began to rub small circles on his back like Meg had done before.

"Cas, we're here for you. You'll be fine."

Castiel lifted tear stained eyes that, as a trick of the light, Sam thought were glowing before the regular blue appeared. The angel nuzzled his head against Dean's neck in a childlike manner and sighed.

After a few more minutes, Dean said, "All right Cas, count of three, we're gonna stand up and go outside. One. Two. Three."

They both stood, Dean switching his arm from Cas' shoulder to around his waist and Sam ran to open the door for them. They got half-way to the car before Castiel began whispering under his breath again.

"Mygraceismyownmygraceism..."

Dean didn't know what that meant but he knew it wasn't anything good for any of them.

* * *

><p>Poor, poor Castiel - even I want to give him a tight hug. And things are only going to get worse from here. I thank you once again for reading. Drop a review to let me know what you think. Have a good weekend everyone. :)<p> 


	7. The Rain Exploded with a Mighty Crash

Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural and as such am not making money for having written this.

Season finale week! Are you freaking out as much as I am? Well, here is your next angst filled chapter. We're going to learn a bit more about what Cas is going through. Thanks to those of you who continue to read this and especially those of you who took the time to review. Enjoy. :)

* * *

><p>Castiel awoke to see the grey interior roof of the truck above his head which meant that, for some reason, he was lying down. Whatever he was lying down on shifted beneath his neck and Meg's face appeared above him.<p>

"You're awake? Good, you can stop using me as your pillow," Meg said before unceremoniously pushing Castiel from her lap and he rolled to the floor like a bag of rocks.

"Meg," Dean said, sternly.

"What? I can't even feel my legs anymore!"

"Well, technically, they're not your legs."

"Still annoying," the demon muttered, rubbing them.

"We left the rest stop?" Castiel asked, climbing back to his seat behind Sam.

Lucifer, now having taken on Bobby's form, appeared suddenly in the empty space between Castiel and Meg so he was sitting wedged between them. While Castiel expected Lucifer in any form to look at the demon Meg with some sort of fatherly, loving affection, the man was staring at the demon with the lowest bit of disdain that Castiel could've sworn it was truly Bobby himself glaring at her.

"That was a few hours ago Cas," Dean said, calling Castiel's mind back from his musings.

Castiel frowned. "I do not remember leaving..."

"Maybe that's for the best," Sam said without even turning around.

When Lucifer/Bobby turned to give Castiel a soft look and tried to give him a pat on the knee, Castiel shifted away and ignored him, trying his hardest to remember that the figure was not real...sort of.

He could've sworn he heard a mutter of "Balls!" before the figure flickered away again.

* * *

><p>As it turned out, the ride to Montana was still much too far away so when it became too dark, the Winchester's decided it was time to stop for the night at the first motel they found.<p>

"Can't you guys stay somewhere nicer? You've got the credit card scam down," Meg asked.

Dean stared at her surprised. "How the hell do you know about that?"

"Pfft, how don't I know?"

Never the less, the first slightly run down place they came across, Dean and Meg got adjoining rooms for the night and again Castiel was left in a room alone with the demon.

"Looks like it's just you and me again tonight, Clarence. You want the bed by the door or by the wall?"

"It does not matter. Either," Castiel said from a chair beside the door.

"Um, I'm giving you a choice in the matter and believe me that never happens. So - door or wall?"

"Pick the wall! Pick the wall!" Lucifer (Nick's form) said, jumping up and down.

"Door."

"Pfft, boooooring."

Castiel sighed as he walked to the bed and sat down on top of the sheets.

"But," Lucifer suddenly whispered in his ear, "I can still help you have some fun."

"Night," Meg said, shutting the light by her bed and climbing under the sheets.

Castiel didn't say anything in response. The room was suddenly becoming warm and his eyes burned for no reason so he rubbed them. Castiel just sat with his back against the headboard and simply stared at the wall across the room while Lucifer continued to laugh manically in his head.

* * *

><p>Dean couldn't have been asleep for more than hour when someone was shaking him awake.<p>

"Dean, man – get up!"

"What?" He was halfway to consciousness when he heard something thumping against the wall. It wasn't regular thumping though, it was more like something or someone hitting the wall. The wall that connected them to the room next door. The one that Cas and Meg…

What was going on next door?

Dean didn't know why but he had a feeling something very bad was happening next door and he needed to go check it out. He was out of his bed and to the door without even bothering to put his shoes on first as he ran in the direction of the next room over. When Sam joined him, Dean rammed his shoulder into the door and it flew inwards.

The scene before the brothers was gruesome; Castiel, his eyes tightly shut, had Meg in a chokehold and was bashing her head again and again into the wall between the beds leaving behind a wide, bloody circle.

"Ugh, what kept you?" Meg choked out.

"Cas, stop!" Dean yelled.

Castiel raised his free hand while turning and Dean was jettisoned through the air into the thin wall at the far end of the room. Staring after his brother, Sam tried to get the angel's attention by standing by his side and talking.

"Cas. Castiel, snap out of it!"

He saw a flicker of _something_ outline Castiel's vessel but he couldn't be completely sure if it was just the light in the room or something else.

"Cas, you gotta hear me man...Lucifer isn't real."

* * *

><p><em>"…Lucifer isn't real...Whatever it is you're seeing...it's not there."<em>

"_What a load of crock!"_

* * *

><p>"He <em>is<em> here, Sam. He is," Castiel said, punctuating the words with another smack of Meg's head.

"No he's not, Cas. Lucifer is just a hallucination."

Castiel's head turned to Sam and he opened his eyes revealing a dark glowing blue that seemed wrong and oddly…familiar.

"Cas," Sam asked, backing away slightly," what's wrong with your eyes?"

"Lucifer _is_ here - in _me_ as he was in you," Castiel said with a whimper, placing his free hand over his heart.

* * *

><p><em>"He's scared of you brother," Lucifer gleefully chirped.<em>

* * *

><p>Castiel flinched and swallowed, looking to his back. He refused to meet Sam's eye again as he spoke in a breathy whisper. "It was not psychosis you were experiencing when I tore down your wall, Sam. Lucifer was speaking to you <em>directly<em> from the cage, trying to take over your body once again. With your soul in a truly _damaged_ manner, he would have been able to _destroy it completely_ and be free of the cage to reclaim what you relinquished when you said yes. When I transferred all of that into myself, Lucifer was...Lucifer was..."

"He what, Cas," Dean asked, wincing but now standing beside his brother.

"He was able to begin something new. Something _worse_."

"What?"

"The Cage..."

* * *

><p><em>"Oops, you're just out of time."<em>

* * *

><p>Castiel suddenly fell backwards into Sam, his body beginning to seize, his hand falling away from Meg's neck as he went. The brothers did their best to keep him comfortable and after a few minutes he stopped.<p>

"You got him, Sam?"

"Yeah."

"Meg. Meg," Dean said, snapping his fingers, trying to get the demon's attention.

"Either of you hear a ringing?"

"Meg you're fine. Where's Cas' meds?"

Meg clutched the back of her head, trying to remember. "Uh, in my jacket pocket?"

Dean retrieved it and removed three bottles, each containing less than seven pills each. "Um, which is the sedative?"

"Sedagive?"

"Tive. Sedative - which one?"

"Blue pill. Should knock him out for the rest of the night into late tomorrow, give or take. Give him two."

Dean shook two out of the bottle and handed them to Sam. He put Castiel's back against the wall and gently opened his mouth and placed the pills on the back of his tongue. Sam massaged the throat and eventually Castiel swallowed.

"Help me get him on the bed," Sam asked his brother.

Dean grabbed his legs and Sam grabbed the torso and together they levered Castiel onto the bed, his head lying on the pillow.

"I'm going to go take a shower - actress girl's blood on the outside isn't going to help style it in the morning," Meg said before disappearing into the bathroom.

Neither brother said anything until the water was turned on.

"How much did you hear of that?" Sam asked.

"Enough to know Lucifer's really real," Dean said. He heavily sighed and rubbed his eyes. "God Cas - what've you gotten yourself into?"

* * *

><p>Got a finale theory you want to share? Review and tell me what you feel is going to happen in the last episode of season 7.<p>

Thanks very much for reading. Next chapter - Dean and Cas talk. See you next time.


	8. Were Searching Everyone

Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural. Others do and I am making absolutely no money for having written this.

How about that finale? I honestly loved it! Now the long wait to October begins.

Here's the next chapter of the story. I hope you all enjoy it. Thanks to all of you for reviewing/alerting/favoring the story this past week. You guys keep me writing.

Dean and Cas are finally going to talk. Revelations abound.

* * *

><p>Dean lightly tapped the side of his fallen friend's face hoping it would be enough to rouse him from his deep slumber. After the stress filled night before, the brothers and Meg had foregone sleep in order to watch the angel for any signs of distress. So far, he hadn't moved as much as an inch. Dean also wasn't above begging at this point either.<p>

"Cas? Cas, man - time to wake up. We can go out, find some more pancakes or suits or…something."

"Still not up?" Sam asked, reentering the room, having taken his shower and getting a fresh set of clothes.

"Still lost to the world," Dean said while sighing.

"Take a break. Frankly, you kind of look like crap," Sam said, trying to convince Dean to leave the room.

"Nah - you and Meg get some food and bring me back something. I'll stick with Cas for a bit longer," Dean said, readjusting the sheet he had pulled up to Castiel's neck in case the angel got cold. If he ever did get cold.

"You sure?"

Dean pulled a watered down version of what Sam knew his brother called a 'bitchface'. Saying nothing else Sam walked out of the room and after a moment Meg, who was sitting by the window reading, followed giving Dean a salute as she went. Dean sighed in relief before looking down at his maligned friend.

"What's going on in that head of yours, man?"

* * *

><p>Castiel was in his favorite garden once again, his back against the big oak tree in the center. He looked down to see himself once again wearing his suit and trench coat rather than Dean's leftover clothes. The flowers were in bloom; birds were singing. Everything appeared to be calm and beautiful around him like always.<p>

Crunching grass announced that someone was approaching him from behind and suddenly the tree Castiel leaned on caught fire! The burning pain to his back and wings caused him to jerk away and stand and there stood Lucifer though not as Castiel had ever seen before now. Castiel looked into the eyes…of himself.

"Hello, Castiel," Lucifer intoned with his voice.

"You are not supposed to be here Lucifer," Castiel murmured. The scenery suddenly began to dim, clouds appearing in the sky.

Lucifer smirked as he ran his hands all over the front of his new body."And yet here I am - in my favorite form yet."

_"Cas, come on man. Wake up!"_

Lucifer chuckled softly as he looked up to the sky. "Your _toy_ wants you walking and talking, Castiel," he said, looking down into Castiel's eyes and tilting his head to the side, "Shouldn't we be a good pet and _oblige_?"

* * *

><p>Dean stepped out of the bathroom after relieving himself and saw Castiel's body shifting under the sheets. The angel's eyes slowly opened and he took in a deep breath.<p>

"Cas, you alive?"

Castiel muttered something Dean didn't recognize as he attempted to sit up by himself. Dean was immediately by Castiel's side, helping lift him up so his back leaned against the headboard. The angel frantically eyed the room searching for something and his eyes finally stopped dead on the man before him. Castiel let out a sound somewhere between a moan and a whimper and Dean knew that whatever the angel saw couldn't possibly be anything good.

"Cas, tell me what you're seeing. Cas!"

* * *

><p><em>"Tell me what you're seeing," Lucifer, as Nick, said from the edge of the bed. <em>

* * *

><p>Castiel brought his hands to the top of his head and threw himself under his sheets and pillow.<p>

"Cas, what's wrong?" Dean asked frantically.

"Get out! Get out! **Get out!**" Cas shouted back, equally frantic.

"Castiel, you need to calm down. Lucifer isn't here."

"Yes he is. He _always_ is."

"No," Dean said, grabbing the smaller man's shoulders and lifting him to a sitting position, "it's just you and me in here Cas. ."

* * *

><p><em>"Just you and me - my favorite last words!" Lucifer off to the side said while clapping. <em>

* * *

><p>"Open your eyes for me, Cas. Come on." Dean hated begging. But, if someone you knew to have always been strong was breaking down more and more as the days went by, you would do anything (anything!) to see them as their old self again.<p>

Slowly Castiel's eyes opened and Dean was pleased to see the blue eyes of the angel searching him, making entirely sure of what (or whom) was near his side.

"Castiel, who am I?" Dean asked, letting go.

It took the angel several seconds but eventually he muttered a low, "Dean. Dean Winchester."

"How sure are you?" Dean asked.

Castiel's breathing became just a bit easier. "I'm sure...enough. Thank you for bringing me back. Again."

"Cas just what are you seeing during these little…episodes?" Dean whispered.

"I'd rather not..." the angel said while swallowing.

"Cas, we had a whole year of you lying and it really won't hurt you to say. Tell me the truth Cas. Please - you owe me that much, at least."

Castiel stared into Dean's eyes, mentally preparing himself for what he was about to say. "Do you remember the conversation we had the first time we trapped Raphael in a circle of holy fire?"

Dean was surprised that the conversation was going to start there. "Yeah...no. Sorry."

Castiel nodded, expecting that and continued. "Once you say yes to an angel there is _always _a direct link to its vessel."

"Yeah, now I remember – he was gonna fry you before you…," Dean said trailing off. He held up a hand and motioned with it in the air while thinking fast. "Wait, fast forwarding a little here – there's always a connection to the vessel no matter what."

"Correct."

"And now the winged dick is still talking to you because now you've made it so he's connected to you instead of Sam?"

Castiel nodded and was about to put his hand down on top of Dean's but stopped himself at the last second and instead put it against his neck and squeezed. He then continued.

"Lucifer comes to me wearing the faces of those whom I've wronged. Balthazar. Rachel. You, Sam and Bobby. My-myself."

"He came looking like you?"

"Before I woke up, it was...unnerving speaking with my mirror image."

"Why'd he look like you though?" Dean asked curiously.

"Well," Castiel said, licking his lips and steeling himself. "I have fallen so very far from my initial mission and…"

He twitched. Castiel took in a deep breath, his eyes moving to the side and Dean knew he was close to losing him again.

"Cas, focus!"

Castiel's eyes found Dean's again and now they were pained and so very scared.

"It's so much harder than I first imagined, Dean. He's always right there, off to the side. He watches me and...and then there's my grace."

"You mentioned something about your grace. Spill."

Castiel groaned and looked around the room but was unable to see any glass of liquid to...

"Tell me about the grace thing, Cas."

"Oh right."

_"You're so dense brother," Lucifer said, reappearing on Castiel's other side._

Castiel turned to look at him but Dean grabbed his face and forced him back. The words tumbled out of the angel's mouth before he could stop them.

"Lucifer's link within my mind plus the Cage's power has begun to taint my grace in a way such that the Cage's Evil is leaking through – in _me_. My grace is becoming tarnished and dark and...Dean, I physically hurt. All over."

Dean frowned and closed his eyes. "Scale of one to ten - how painful?"

"I…I don't think I have a number to properly quantify how it's making me feel."

"Why didn't you tell me any of this before - we could've helped you already!"

"We didn't…we didn't part friends, Dean." Castiel hunched forward and Dean caught him as the angel's body began to shake again.

"Cas, what is? What's wrong?"

Castiel moaned before looking up to the ceiling and letting out a loud, inhuman screech making the windows both attached to the room and in a four block radius explode. He collapsed backwards, his eyes still wide open and when Dean looked into them they were changed. The whites of his eyes were still white, but the pupil and iris were a murky blue, swimming and giving off an iridescent glow. Sort of like...like...

"The Yellow Eyed Demon," Dean whispered fearfully.

No - what the hell was happening to Cas? He couldn't be. Was he seriously turning into…a supercharged demon?

The sound of their truck pulling up in the parking lot made Dean look up just in time to see Sam and Meg coming towards the doorway. They took in the broken window and stepped over the broken glass while walking through the door.

"Dean, what's going on?" Sam asked, putting down a greasy bag.

Dean rubbed his hands together and sighed. He shook his head and shakily said, "Sam, we've gotta talk."

* * *

><p>Thanks very much for reading. Leave a review and let me know what you think. Also, I'm working on a summer long, post season 7 story about Team Free Will being separated so please check it out - Dreamwalks and Waking Nightmares.<p>

Have a nice week everyone. :)


	9. As We Fell Into the Sun

Disclaimer: I do not own anything within the Supernatural franchise. I am not doing this for any monetary gain.

We've got some fun stuff here today. After the last chapter you probably thought things couldn't get any worse. Enjoy.

* * *

><p>Castiel opened his eyes and for the third time found himself in the beautiful garden of his preferred heaven. Instinctively he looked around and was mercifully alone at the moment. He gazed up at the sky and it was a lovely shade of blue, the kind that signaled the approaching summer. Perhaps he would interact with this heaven's owner Philip Turner again - it had been too long. Castiel could recite some poetry as Philip enjoyed it the last time. Sitting up, Castiel located the kite floating in the sky and walked towards it and the shadowy figure which held the string in their hands. As he reached him however, the figure was not that of the owner of this heaven. Lucifer was the one flying the kite in his Nick form once again. The fallen angel turned and, like a ghost, was suddenly standing right before Castiel.<p>

"Hey little brother; got a treat for you," Lucifer said, slapping Castiel weakly on the cheek.

"Lucifer, what -" Castiel managed to say before the fallen angel's hand let go of the kite string and shot forward, through Castiel's body, embedding deep into his true form. As his knees buckled beneath him and he collapsed, Castiel hurtfully looked up to his older brother with wide eyes. Lucifer only smirked. When the hand was removed, Castiel's body glowed with an outline of red light and the sky up above went from a beautiful blue to a cloud covered stormy gray once again.

* * *

><p>"Wait, Dean, what? Start over."<p>

Dean rolled his eyes. "He told me Lucifer is turning him, I don't know, evil or something. And Sam, his eyes - they were like Yellow Eyes' but blue."

The brothers were currently sitting side by side at the edge of Castiel's bed while Meg leaned against the nearest wall listening in. Castiel himself was still unconscious and Dean was actually grateful for that.

"So what're you going to do now?" Meg asked, actually sounding worried.

Dean shrugged. "I don't know. Make sure he doesn't go dark side, I guess."

"But Dean, what if we can't do anything," Sam asked slowly, trying very hard not to think about the answer himself.

Instead of answering, Dean turned to Meg and asked, "What do you know about the Cage itself?"

Meg pushed herself off of the wall and thought about it as she closed her eyes, remembering. There were many things of hell which immediately came to mind, having been a resident for so long. She hesitated a second before speaking.

"The Cage. Well, not much. Pieced a few things together from what Yellow Eyes and Lucifer have told me…."

"And?"

"The Cage is a special dimension deep in the bowels of hell made of pure Evil."

Dean snorted. "Sounds like most of hell itself."

"Yeah well guess again. That's Evil with a capital 'E'. It's not a concept but an actual corporeal _living_ thing. Long, long ago Lucifer took some of that Evil and transferred it to Yellow Eyes just after the fall, twisting him and turning him into what we all remember. He did that for everyone that followed him."

"Sam's soul was in the Cage too," Dean pointed out, "how's he not evil?"

"Lucifer or Michael protected him? How the hell should I know?"

Dean held up his hand. "So Yellow-Eyes wasn't always the evil demon bastard who went around poisoning young children and destroying families?"

"I'm saying Yellow-Eyes, or Azazel as he's truly known, started his life or some facsimile, well away from the fires of down below."

Sam leaned forward and his eyes slowly trailed upward till he was looking up at the ceiling. "I've read in some legends and lore about the war up in heaven and Azael's name sometimes pops up on Lucifer's side. Azazel… the one who brought weapons to humanity."

"That's right. He did - and look at what we went and did with them," Meg said, extending her hand outward with a smirk.

"I'm sorry," Dean said, trying and failing to not look as confused as he felt, "but where is this all going?"

"Dean – weapons were a gift from heaven. If Azazel brought a gift of heaven to humanity, then that means…" Sam said.

"Whoa, whoa – wait a minute. You're saying that once, like a gazillion years ago, Azazel or Yellow-Eyes was…an angel?"

Meg frowned and shrugged her shoulders. "It's not all just human souls down there Deano. It takes a lot of power to turn something once so pure into something so dark and evil. Lucifer wasn't the only angel cast out in that fight."

"Okay," Dean said, trying to get used to the idea, "so, Lucifer pumped him full of this so called "Evil" from the Cage, making him a demon? And now…now he's doing the same with Cas?"

"Castiel's mind is damaged goods thanks to his taking on Sammy-boy's problems. You do the math."

Everything was looking bleaker by the second for their friend. Dean could feel something akin to an ulcer forming in the pit of his stomach.

"This can either go quickly or slow," Meg said. "But knowing Lucifer it'll be fast and out of nowhere. We've got to watch the tree topper for any signs. He does something out of the norm, stop him the easy way. And if there's no way to help..."

The silence hung in the air for a moment and Dean nodded. "Right. We'll have to…stop him. Permanently."

"By any means necessary. Think you can handle that?"

Dean took one more glance at his friend and walked out of the room without an answer. He wiped stubbornly at his eyes as he leaned his back against the wall and stared up at the sky. Dean then turned and punched the wall before walking back to his and Sam's motel room and slamming the door shut.

* * *

><p>After the Winchesters had gone back to their room for a nap or something, Meg was basically left on her own. Currently she was flipping idly through the television channels when the sheets on the bed beside her shifted.<p>

"You awake, Clarence?" she asked, not bothering to turn away from the screen.

The sound of clothes against sheets had her turning her head to see the back of Castiel as he sat up, his legs hanging off the side of his bed. He shook his head and ran his fingers roughly through his hair, clenching his locks tightly as if he was in pain.

Meg still refused to move unless it was completely necessary. "You need something?"

"No," he growled out.

Meg turned off the television, turned and jumped. Castiel with murky blue eyes stared back at her with his head tilted ever so slightly to the side and his mouth open in a tiny 'o' as if he were studying her for the first time. In the blink of an eye he vanished from the bed and loomed before her. If the sweat on his brow and the heat radiating off of him was any indication, it appeared as though the angel was fighting off a fever or something.

He grabbed her by the side of the neck and before she could even utter 'Let go of me!' they vanished from the motel room.

* * *

><p>Dean rolled over in the bed and somehow managed to land on the floor.<p>

"What happened?" Sam asked distractedly from his laptop.

"Nothing. Slipped."

Sam turned and blearily looked at the clock. "It's after 4. I think we wasted enough time."

"Yeah. I call bathroom, you call Meg," Dean said, stumbling into the bathroom and closing the door behind him.

He had just finished pulling his zipper back up when his brother began knocking on the door, asking him to come out. Dean washed his hands and walked back into the room to find his brother throwing on a jacket and then tossing one to Dean as he went out the front door.

"Sam?" Dean questioned as he followed.

"I called the room and there wasn't an answer."

The door to Meg and Castiel's room was unlocked and when they went inside, neither angel nor demon was anywhere to be found.

Sam turned to Dean and Dean smacked his hand against the nearest wall.

"Son of a bitch!"

* * *

><p>Sirens wailed and people were walking and talking at a distance away. Meg awoke in the back alley of some big city. It was dark and her body was covered in something warm, sticky and metallically scented. Castiel was sitting before her, clenching his angel blade between his fingers and his body was hunched forward, shivering a little. Meg followed his gaze and beneath her was a large devil's trap made not with red paint but human blood.<p>

"Have to get it out. It's not mine anymore. Have to get it out."

The words were coming from out of Castiel's mouth steadily but they made no sense to her whatsoever.

Quietly she asked, "Get what out Clarence?"

"The Light. Hurts. Not mine anymore. _Have_ to get it _out_," he said, voice cracking.

Meg tried to reach out to smack him, get him to at least break out of whatever _this_ was but he was just outside of the range of the trap.

Getting frustrated she asked, "Castiel – what the _hell_ are you talking about?"

"The Light," he said again, this time looking up. His eyes were still that weird blue and also a little freaked out. He lifted his hands and they were also covered in blood, same as the trap. "The Light needs to leave me alone."

Castiel clutched his head and in the poor light Meg could see the entire front of his shirt was covered in slick red blood. The angel blade had blood on it as well. Putting two and two together Meg realized the angel had literally carved himself up with his own blade to make the trap for her. To think Castiel had done that to his meatsuit actually managed to frighten Meg just a little bit. She took a deep breath and spoke to him again in lower tones.

"All right Castiel. You need to wake up, okay? I'm a demon and you're a freaking angel. That light is yours and makes you…you."

Castiel twitched and before Meg's eyes, his own slowly began to clear up.

"You are not what I am and you never will be," she said, trying not to laugh. "Not if your little friends have any say in the matter. Personally, I'd find you a little hotter but...beggars can't be choosers."

He shakily stood up and took stock of himself, the blood and the alley before finally noticing Meg was below him trapped in a devil's trap.

"Meg? What hap-"

"Can you let me out of here? We need to get back to the motel and get you cleaned up before the others find out you went guano again."

Castiel waved a hand and a small section of the circle disappeared. Meg strode forward and stepped in Castiel's space. Not knowing why, she gave him a reassuring pat on the shoulder. He swallowed and touched unsteady fingers to her forehead. A second later they were gone.

* * *

><p>There was some mention while I was doing research about Azazel actually having been an angel and I'm really going with that for this story. I've come to the conclusion that I'm actually being worse to Castiel here than even the show was. Sorry. I hope you will all continue to stick around and read the story. Thanks very much for reading this time.<p> 


	10. A Bell was Ringing

Disclaimer: Supernatural is not mine. I am making no money for having done this.

Thank you for continuing to read this story week after week. I am glad you would like to see it continue to the very end. I will admit that the majority of this chapter is filler and I'm not completely pleased with it as a whole. I'd also like to say at the moment that the next couple of weeks, my schedule is kind of going to be busy so I'm not sure I'll be able to update on time. But the good news is I've got my end game for this story so I'm going to be working on that, my Gen Mini Big Bang and a thing I volunteered for in my community.

Okay, enough talking. Enjoy the chapter. :)

* * *

><p>Dean and Sam were just getting settled in the truck, Dean turning the key in the ignition, when the missing angel and demon appeared in the backseat making the two hunters jump in their seats.<p>

"Would you warn me next time before we take off?" Meg growled, giving Castiel a punch on the shoulder and then fixing her hair. She also gave him an extra look over, taking some strange note of the state of Castiel's body but pretending to be nonchalant about it.

"What happened?" Dean asked, turning the ignition off.

Neither Castiel nor Meg appeared to really want to tell the others what had happened so reluctantly Meg only said with a clearly put upon smirk, "Cas went a little nuts again and kidnapped me. I've gotta say Clarence, all this extra attention you're giving me, makes a girl wonder..."

Dean rolled his eyes. "Shut up, Meg. Cas - got something to say?"

"What - what Meg says is true. I - don't know why I did what I did. I took Meg out of the room and we…talked. I am fine now and we can leave this establishment and continue driving to Montana."

Dean shared a look with his brother. Neither one of them was buying it. But if Cas said he was fine then he was. Probably the Winchester definition of fine but…whatever. Sighing, Dean took a look at his powerful yet helpless friend in the backseat that was shiftily looking between his hands, the seat next to him and out the windows and hoped that it would not be necessary to put Cas down in the near future. He didn't want to have to go through losing his best and only real friend outside of his brother again, especially after he had just gotten him back. He wouldn't have it.

* * *

><p>Dean refused vociferously to stopping at all Biggersons that they'd passed on the highways and therefore the group decided on another roadside diner called "Sal's".<p>

"Ugh, this place is filthy," Meg said, running her finger along the table top.

"If you don't like it, then just leave," Dean said as he took a sip from his soda. When Meg didn't budge he smirked at her and turned to his brother who was reading something on his phone. "Any news on Dick?"

"Not really. It looks like he's investing a lot of funds in some company called Sucrocorp..."

"This Dick is proving to be hard to put down," Castiel murmured darkly, unconsciously rubbing his hands together.

Everyone stopped staring at him when the waitress arrived with their meals and set them on the table. Castiel was raising his fork with meatloaf on it to his mouth but stopped and tilted his head.

"What is it Cas?" Sam asked while frowning at his salad. "Lucifer sighting?"

"Someone is coming..."

The bell above the entrance jingled and all four of them turned to look before ducking for cover.

Meg groaned. "Tell me that's not..."

"Hello Boys. Whore."

Crowley – just what they did not need right now.

Everyone sat up straight in their seats and immediately Dean noticed that there were only three of them at the table where there had been four just a second ago. Cas had disappeared to wherever so now was the time to improvise.

Dean licked his lips and folded his hands together on the tabletop. Grinning like it was no big deal for the Winchesters to be dining with a known demon enemy he said, evenly, "Crowley."

Crowley smirked down at them with a knowing glint in his eyes. "I know I shouldn't even ask but -"

Meg took up the conversation and motioned her hand to the Winchesters while saying, "Well we're working together to stop a common enemy, you smarmy dick."

"Ah, yes - Mr. Roman I presume," Crowley said to Meg before turning back to Sam and Dean. "Well, well working with a demon again. Funny how you frowned so deeply at your little angel friend doing the same -"

"Cas is dead," Dean butted in right away, "so we'll take whatever allies we can get at this stage of the game. Unless of course you'd like to throw a hat in the ring?"

"Throw in my lot with you two? Please – what've you done for me lately?" Crowley chuckled before noticing the fourth plate on the tabletop. "Have a guest?"

"No it's, um, mine too. Was hungry - wanted two dinners," Dean said, pulling Cas' meatloaf closer.

"Anything else?" Sam asked, putting a fork full of Caesar salad into his mouth.

Crowley smirked again but said nothing, walking back out the door he'd entered through. Dean and Meg watched him walk halfway through the parking lot before he disappeared.

"That was way too random and close," Meg muttered.

The door to the men's room opened and Castiel exited and walked back to the table. "I heard everything," he said, taking his seat. "May I please have my meatloaf back, Dean?"

Everyone returned to their meals and before long they took to the road once again.

* * *

><p>They arrived at the cabin in the woods at around four o'clock in the morning.<p>

"I think I might've preferred the crappy motel rooms," Meg said, walking inside and stopping and freezing in the devil's trap just barely covered by the rug. "Um, boys?"

"What - oh."

They all turned back and Sam moved forward as though to set her free but Dean stopped him at the last second.

"Why?"

Dean inclined his head in her direction."Cause she's going to spend the night here."

"What?" Sam and Meg asked as Castiel simply tilted his head in confusion.

"We've been burned in the ass by enough demons already. You especially. Plus the majority of the weapons that are stashed here…"

Castiel turned to Dean then and said "Dean, she is safe to enter."

Dean stared dumbfounded at his friend. "Cas, are you sure?"

"Yes."

"You're...you're not exactly in your right mind -"

"I will watch her and make sure she does no harm."

Dean made to walk forward (preferably to shake the angel by the shoulders) but Sam held up his hand to stop whatever fight his brother wanted to begin. Instead of arguing Sam simply grabbed his own knife and scraped away a side of the circle and Meg walked free. Dean walked away from everyone and slammed a door off in some side room.

"You'll watch her?" Sam asked Castiel a little unsurely.

"I will watch her. She will watch me," Castiel said sharing a look with the demon.

"Okay, it's late and Dean and I are probably going to have some discussion about this so - there's a room upstairs with one bed and a chair. Take that."

Meg nodded and walked off.

Sam sighed and turned to Castiel who had yet to leave. "Do you really trust her?"

"She was my guardian. She went searching for me when I vanished," Castiel said. "I believe she will not kill anyone."

Castiel bid his good night to Sam and left to go upstairs. He made it halfway up but stopped.

"Sam?"

Sam poked his head out of the refrigerator, a bottle of water in hand. "Yeah, Cas?"

Castiel turned back around and walked back down the stairs to stand before Sam Winchester, his friend and brother in arms. He licked his lips and in a very human gesture, took a breath in and let it out. He looked the young man square in the eye and said, "I trapped Meg in a devil's trap made from my own blood. That was from where we had reappeared."

Sam put his water bottle down on the counter, crossed his arms and waited for the angel to continue speaking.

"I felt a strange heaviness in my true form and it was inside of me, burning me. There was a voice speaking to me, ordering me to cause the demon harm. And it said the heaviness would go away if I did as it asked. I held my angel blade in hand and I wantedvery muchto comply. I wanted to…to feel Meg's blood between my fingers, Sam."

"But you didn't. You stopped yourself?"

"I fought against the force, yes. Instead, I chose to trap her using my own blood to do so."

"Why're you telling me this, Cas?"

"I am afraid, Sam. I am afraid of what is happening to me. Of what I might be becoming," Castiel whispered, chancing a look at Sam.

Sam bit the inside of his cheek and looked back at the refrigerator. He opened it and put the water bottle back inside before removing two bottles of beer, one for each of them. Castiel opened the cap of his and took a sip. He did his best to hide a flinch as the drink burned his throat on the way down. Another new, devastating development. He was being affected by the holy water that Bobby had taught the boys to put in all drinks – something pure beings would not notice but the dark ones would be harmed by. It was true then; he was becoming something dark and foul. Castiel rubbed his eyes and felt a strange wetness on his fingers.

"We're gonna get through this Cas," Sam said, drinking deeply from his bottle and putting his hand on the angel's shoulder.

Castiel took another sip and coughed as wisps of smoke exited his mouth. Sam deflated and rubbed his eyes. Why did everything get worse instead of better in their lives? Don't they deserve something good, ever?

"I'm going to head to bed Cas. See you later," Sam said, patting Castiel on the shoulder as he went.

"Good night, Sam. You are not going to…mention any of this to Dean?" Castiel asked.

"No," Sam said, shaking his head. "It'll just stay between the two of us."

The last thing Sam saw before shutting the door was Castiel standing in the center of the room, his head down, his shoulders slumped and looking ready to collapse at any second. In Sam's eyes, Castiel looked utterly terrified. It made him very badly want to follow his brother's example and punch a wall. Despite all the crap Cas had done in the name of free will, no one (especially an angel) deserved this desolate fate. If going full-on Azazel was what Cas had to look forward to then (and it pained him to even think about it) Sam needed to make sure the Colt was in a safe place where only he knew the location, should the worst happen. He prayed to an absent God that it would not come to that.


	11. For the Rabbits on the Run

Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural. This is not for any monetary gain whatsoever and is purely for amusement.

Hey, a little over a day late but here it is. Thank you for continuing to read the story and wanting to reach the end along with me. Now, it's going to be another busy week next week and I might not have time to update at all so I hope the ending here is to your liking. Please continue to read and review because honestly it's you guys that keep me going. Enjoy. :)

* * *

><p>Sam woke up the next morning to a bright and empty bedroom. The sunlight was shining on his face and that was just weird. Dean never opened a window, ever. Today, for whatever reason, he did. Shaking the sleep from his mind, Sam got out of his bed and trudged to the upstairs bathroom only to find the door locked.<p>

"Dean? Dean, you gonna be long in there?"

The door opened a crack and Meg's head covered in shampoo popped out. "Guess again. Your bro's downstairs making breakfast with Cas."

Sam's face turned beet red and he motioned his head inside. "But I've gotta..."

Meg sinisterly smirked. "Find a tree, Sasquatch," she said and shut the door in his face.

Sam groaned as he walked back downstairs to the bedroom to grab his boots, crossing his legs and concentrating hard on anything but running water. He ran past everyone and out into the yard, stopping once to look back and see his brother's face staring at him from the window in confusion. Sam didn't even bother to say anything as he walked towards the furthest tree he could find, unzipped, and sighed.

* * *

><p>"Where is Sam going?" Castiel asked from his seat at the kitchen table.<p>

"Beats me," Dean said, grabbing two cups of coffee and handing one to the angel and keeping the other for himself.

"Morning boys," Meg announced, jumping down from the final step.

"Do you know where Sam went?" Dean asked.

Meg snickered as the front door flew open and Sam ran back inside.

"Dean, there's something you've got to see out here," Sam said, pointing his thumb out the door.

"Sam I just poured the coffee and I've got bacon on the stove..."

"Dean, it's important."

Dean rolled his eyes, grabbed his mug and followed his brother back out the door. "This'd better be good Sam," Dean said, stopping for a minute to take a sip.

Sam practically ran a few feet ahead of his brother and stopped. Dean joined him and both of them looked down into a hole, roughly two feet wide and three feet deep, filled with dead animal life - decapitated heads, tails, arms - the works.

"Huh?"

The two Winchesters leaned over the hole and then looked at each other.

* * *

><p>"You sleep better last night?" Meg asked before bringing her own mug of coffee to her lips.<p>

Castiel's eyes didn't look up from the table but he answered, "It was better than it has been."

Meg took a seat next to him and sighed. "Why do you say that like it's a bad thing?"

* * *

><p>"What the hell could've done <em>this<em>?" Sam asked, looking to his brother for an answer.

Dean shook his head. "I don't know. A bear?"

"Do you think it was...?"

"What, Meg? I don't think she'd bother messing with furry woodland creatures. People are more her sty-"

"Not Meg."

"What then - Cas?" Dean asked incredulously. "Sam, we only got in before daybreak. Come up with another idea and run it by me."

Sam didn't want to mention it because he promised he wouldn't but…"Dean, after you left last night, Cas and I talked and…things with him haven't exactly been normal. We should take extra precautions."

Dean ran his hand over his mouth and nodded after a solid minute of thought. "All right," he said, pinching the bridge of his nose. "We'll go back and talk to him. But if he gets mad at us – you're dealing with it."

* * *

><p>Castiel was just turning off the bacon when the Winchesters reappeared. "Meg, can you clear out for a little bit?" Dean said.<p>

"Why?"

"We need to talk to Cas. We'll let you back in when we're done."

"All right," Meg said, ruffling Castiel's hair as she went. He swatted her hands away and glared after her like an irritated child.

Castiel returned to his seat and sat up straight in his chair as the two Winchester's took the seats opposite from him. "What is wrong?"

"How'd you sleep last night, Cas?" Sam asked with a poignant look in his eyes.

"I slept fine. Did you?"

"Cas - did you leave the house _at all_ after we all went to sleep?" Dean asked in a single breath.

Castiel leaned forward and clasped his hands together. "What happened Dean?"

"Answer the question Cas. Did you leave?"

"No," the angel said shortly. He rubbed his face with his hand before continuing. "I slept like I've become accustomed to doing since I was in the…ward."

Dean breathed out a sigh of relief, glared at his brother, and got up to turn the bacon back on. "We found a pile of dead animal parts in the woods and thought..."

"What?" Castiel asked suspiciously.

"Well we thought..." Sam started and ended with hand motions that made no sense.

Castiel stared at both of them, looking like he was trying to keep the urge to smite at bay."You thought I had something to do with it? In one night?"

"That's not what we're saying anymore, Cas. We can drop it. How do you like your bacon?"

Castiel vanished before the brother's eyes in a huff.

Sam sighed and put his head in his hands. "Maybe we were wrong to accuse him."

"Damn it Sam, it was your idea!" Dean shouted, slamming down another pan so he could make some eggs.

"I panicked! I just didn't think..."

"What - that he'd take it badly? He's scared Sam. He's scared of what he's apparently turning into. And...I'm worried."

"Worried?"

"Look, eventually we're going to have to go after Leviathans and back on regular hunts. Where are we going to keep him, Sam? I don't know if we should keep him here or, or – send him to Jody's or something."

"I think Cas can take care of himself, Dean – he's a big angel. And there is Meg too, I mean, she can keep an eye on him. Jody will be a backup phone number we can leave for him."

Dean poured himself another cup of coffee and spoke no more. The conversation, for now, was over.

* * *

><p>He appeared in the clearing where the hole full of dead animals sat. Castiel could smell the residue of something mixed with the dead animal's blood - a drool of some sort. He leaned over and dipped a finger in, taking a sniff and then a taste. Standing up again Castiel followed the scent further and further into the woods until the light was completely obscured by the high tree branches.<p>

There, standing in the distance and gnawing on a squirrel, was a full-grown Aswang.

Castiel looked back the way he came and back at the creature. No one knew he was here and he had no backup. But...he was still an angel. A simple Aswang shouldn't be too much of a problem. Castiel summoned his angel sword to his hand, raised it and charged forward. The creature screeched at the oncoming threat and swiped a hand across Castiel's stomach, throwing him into a nearby tree and splitting it in half.

The Aswang screeched again, flashing its sharp teeth. Castiel wiped his mouth with the side of his hand as he stood and prepared to attack again.

Lucifer suddenly appeared to his right, hand under his chin, in thought. "Oh come on Castiel - don't get your ass handed to you by a weak creature like _that_."

"You are not really here brother. It is all within my mind."

"Yeah? Well watch out."

Castiel turned again to the Aswang and stabbed the creature in the stomach, wounding it.

"You think a stab wound is going to stop it?"

"Shut up."

"Come on Cas, you've got the juice to do this - I gave it to you after all."

"I will not..."

Lucifer's voice whispered in Castiel's ear, "What if it knocks you out and goes after your little friends? Goes after precious _Dean_ in his sleep?"

The Aswang screeched a third time, its thin, leathery wings spreading apart behind its shoulder blades as it prepared to take flight. It got four feet into the air before Castiel reached out a hand and used his mind to hold the beast in place. The Aswang attempted to continue flying but Castiel (through sheer _anger_) forced it quickly back to the ground, creating a large crater beneath it. Castiel walked forward and leaned over the hole.

"You will not harm anything anymore," he stated just before stabbing the monster in the neck, pulling his sword through muscles, releasing torrents of blood until the sword exited on the other end, essentially halfway decapitating it.

Castiel took several deep breaths and heard someone whistling.

"Very nice work brother," Lucifer said, looking down at Castiel's work and back at the angel again. "Oh, nice eyes."

Castiel frowned and walked back a few inches and stumbled over a log he hadn't seen. He shook his head but Lucifer still remained.

"My little Blue Eyed Demon," Lucifer said with a smirk as he wiped away a fake tear.

"No, I am not turning into...that," Castiel murmured, crawling backwards.

"It's only a matter of time."

Castiel got to his feet and started running back.

"Only a matter of time!"


	12. Thought of Giving it All Away

Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural in any way. This is not being done for profit - just amusement.

Sorry about not updating last week. I was busy working for my church's bible school and wasn't able to work on the edit for this chapter. But, here it is now. We're finally injecting some canon events into the story and things are still moving forward. Enjoy.

* * *

><p>Meg left the cabin a day after the brothers went to check out a case in Kansas to help another hunter they'd met months before. That was then followed by another case out in California meaning they had been gone for almost two and a half weeks.<p>

Castiel had been left alone in the Montana cabin the entire time. He started every day with breakfast followed by taking long walks in the woods until he either ate again or cleaned. By the time he finished, it was time for sleep and the whole cycle would begin again the next day. Sometimes while cleaning, he had taken to turning on a radio he had found hidden away in an upstairs room. It had obviously been modified so it would be able to pick up signals while so far away from civilization. The station he had found played the same songs every day, at different times and there was one in particular that he couldn't help but pay attention to every time it was played. The lyrics spoke of a monarch who lost his kingdom, fell from power and would not be able to find the glory of heaven upon his death. The situation felt very relatable. Still, Castiel muttered the lyrics to himself throughout the day as he better organized and cleaned up the musty cabin until the brothers returned. It helped him to keep a level head and not think about his brother and what had happened in the woods with the aswang which still continued to haunt him.

Not that Lucifer was about to stop badgering him anytime soon. "So you used a little demonic power - who hasn't? Sam sure knows what it's like. You should talk to him about it. You know he still has the abilities but he just doesn't use them anymore. Loser."

Castiel shut his eyes and ignored his brother, humming the tune of the song under his breath and when he opened his eyes again he was fortunately alone.

* * *

><p>The Winchesters finally returned after a few more days, both of them looking disturbed and angry.<p>

"What happened?" Castiel asked from the kitchen where he was washing the dishes he'd used for his earlier breakfast.

"What happened? What happened?" Dean asked, flopping down on the couch and dropping a metal flask onto the small table in front of him. "Bobby's what happened."

Castiel looked to him and then to Sam confused.

Sam rubbed his eyes and explained. "Turns out Bobby isn't as dead as we originally thought. His soul's tied to his flask which Dean has been _carrying around for months_."

"He shouldn't have done that Sammy. He should've just…just let it all go. You **know** what happens to someone who doesn't stay dead. What we're going to have to do now that we know he's hanging on."

"Bobby's a ghost?" How had Castiel missed that? He should have been able to sense his spirit right away.

"You must be slipping bro," Lucifer commented from behind him as he scanned the newspaper the boys brought back with them, Dick Roman's face smiling from the front cover.

Suddenly Dean stood and left the cabin, not saying where he was going, leaving Sam and Castiel alone. While Castiel stared back at the door, Sam wordlessly grabbed his laptop from his bag and set it on the kitchen table and waited for it to turn on. Castiel turned the radio back on and returned to finishing his dishes.

"Since when do you listen to music?" Sam asked while typing.

"It was quiet after everyone left," Castiel said while wiping a plate. "It was something to...fill the silence apart from..."

Sam nodded and made a noncommittal grunting sound.

"It's all right, Cas. I get it."

"You...get it?"

"Yeah, it's fine. A little better than what Dean listens to anyway. Make it louder if you want."

Castiel nodded and returned to his task. He wiped the front of one dish before turning back around and opening his mouth. Sam's back was to him and he was absorbed in whatever he was reading. He decided this was not a good time to ask him about what Lucifer mentioned about Sam's demon blood.

* * *

><p>Day turned to night and night meant it was eventually time to go to sleep. For humans anyway.<p>

Sleep did not come to Castiel that night to calm him though. When had sleep actually start to become a problem for him anyway? He was a full angel - not fallen. Definitely not human.

With the passing minutes he started to find the walls of his room too confining. A literal box. He needed to _get out_ of the cabin. Take a walk. He flew to an empty clearing deep in the woods and took a deep breath in and then slowly let it out. He took one step forward when he heard the tell-tale flutter of something, or someone, behind him. He turned his head slightly but no one was there. He turned back and was face to face with an angel blade coming forward that he barely managed to duck in time.

"Hello Castiel," a blonde haired woman snarled at him as she resumed her attack.

Castiel summoned his own blade and sliced at empty air as the woman had disappeared again. She appeared behind him and Castiel bent over and used his legs to knock her off balance. When she fell to the ground, he pinned her down and glared at her.

"Hester."

In a very unladylike and unangelic way, she snorted. "You remember me. Enjoying your stay with the mud-monkeys and other _filth_?" she said with a sneer.

Castiel stared at the member of his former garrison for a minute before standing upright and grabbing her, helping her up too. She made to attack him yet again but Castiel grabbed the blade from her hand and threw both his and hers several yards away. Hester reeled back her fist instead and punched Castiel squarely on the left cheek and repeated the action several times afterwards.

"Enough."

She picked him up by the collar of his shirt and said, "I know they're here, Castiel. I know you are not alone. Where are they?"

It took Castiel several hazy seconds to realize she wasn't here looking for him. Hester was searching for the brothers and that upset him. A voice spoke to him from inside of his head but, instead of sounding like Lucifer, the voice was remarkably his own.

_"She's going to hurt the only family you have, Castiel. You need to stop her before she kills them," _it said with an echo as dark as an unilluminated tunnel.

A switch suddenly flipped on in Castiel's head at that very moment. More awake and alert than he'd been, he extended his hand outward and the other angel was violently pushed back against a tree in the far distance and Castiel pinned her there as he slowly got back on his feet. Hester attempted to fight against the force but Castiel did not allow her.

"What is this? What're you doing Castiel?"

"You are not to harm the Winchesters, Hester," he intoned quietly as he walked closer to her.

Castiel stepped through a shaft of moonlight between the trees and Hester's eyes widened in fear. "Your eyes! What is wrong with your eyes?"

Not answering, Castiel made his angel blade materialize in his other hand and in the blink of a human eye stood before her and forced the sword up under Hester's chin and through to the vessel's brain, effectively killing the being: mind, body, soul and grace. Hester and her vessel were dead.

As he held onto his weapon, the handle of the blade was suddenly hot to Castiel's touch and he removed his hand and stared in amazement at the burn it left behind. He poked a curious finger at the weapon and it burned him again. He could not handle his own weapon. The only creatures unable to handle weapons of heaven were…the fallen. Abominations - like the creature Azazel became. The word swirled through his mind until it gave way to rage. Hot anger from within burned at both Hester and himself and when Castiel's hand touched the body Hester had used, it burst into flames and disintegrated leaving only ashes on the ground and coating his sneakers. He smiled; secretly glad to not have to deal with her returning.

"Cas?"

Castiel quickly turned and Sam Winchester stood a few feet away, his hands hidden in the front pocket of his hooded sweatshirt. Sam immediately noticed the charred shape of a body on the tree behind him and looked at his friend questioningly taking one and then two steps forward.

"Cas, what's going -?"

The voice drowned out whatever Sam was about to say._"He's going to tell his brother Castiel," _it said._ "He'll kill you – they both will. You do not want that to happen again, do you?"_

His body shaking, Castiel raised his hand again and this time squeezed it tightly into a fist. Sam's eyes widened much like Hester's had as he fell to his knees and he gasped for air. Castiel walked towards him as he released his fist and Sam collapsed and looked up.

_"Stop him Castiel. Stop him. Kill him Castiel – you have all the power you need!"_

Before he was able to continue his attack, something hard and metallic smacked against the back of his head. He knew no more after that.

* * *

><p>Sam looked up to see Dean holding an iron pipe against his shoulder like a baseball bat. Dean helped get him to his feet and then turned over the now unconscious angel.<p>

"You okay?" Dean asked without looking up.

"No - Cas tried to kill me."

Dean looked up at Sam. "Again?"

At Sam's eye roll, Dean let it slide and motioned to the cabin.

"Let's get him back and on lockdown and then you can go for your run."

"Okay," Sam said reluctantly while nodding and they trudged back home.

From the back pocket of Dean's jeans, the metal flask glinted in the early morning sun. The spirit of Bobby Singer stood and watched in silence what had become of the family he had left behind. He tried to fight against the anger he felt, but…

The wind suddenly picked up, ruffling the boys hair. They looked back but didn't see anything. Castiel moaned in the throes of whatever was going through his head right now and Dean felt horrible.

"It'll be all right Cas," Dean murmured as he continued walking. "We're almost home."

"Make the voice stop Dean – they made me try to kill Sam. They still want me to kill you too."

Sam and Dean both reeled at the sound of their friend's voice. He had never sounded so frantic, so afraid.

"All right Cas. Relax. We're almost home and then we'll figure it out."

Castiel began to hum something Dean didn't really recognize. Sam was nodding along to whatever it was. Probably some Enochian chant.

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><p>Guess the song Castiel liked and you get a free cookie courtesy of the internet. See you all next week.<p> 


	13. If I Ever Get Out of Here

Disclaimer: I still do not own Supernatural. This is done purely for amusement and I am receiving no money for having written any of this.

Hello all. Here's the next chapter and things are going downhill quickly. Thank you very much for your previous reviews and adding the story to your alerts and for simply reading. Enjoy.

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><p>Dean paced while his brother sat on the couch, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees and his hands under his chin. Neither one of them had said anything for hours since Sam got back from his run.<p>

"Boys."

Sam and Dean both jumped because suddenly standing by the window with his arms crossed was the spirit of Bobby Singer and he was frowning at them.

"Feathers is waking up."

Sam got to his feet and Dean reached the door first. This was going to be another conversation that neither of them wanted to have. But it was necessary. They needed to get to the bottom of this and stop it before things got further out of control. Castiel was their good friend. Everything was going to be okay. It had to be.

* * *

><p>He felt the heat surrounding his body like a blanket as he slowly came back to consciousness. Castiel rolled over and onto his back, his eyes only looking up at the cloudless sky.<p>

"Hey."

Castiel sat up to see Sam and Dean standing side by side just outside of a ring of holy fire.

"We've gotta stop doing this, man," Dean said sincerely, walking to the very edge of the fire and looking down.

Castiel wanted to disagree but, well, Dean was right. He was beginning to partially regret having introduced them to the concept of trapping angels.

His mind was still a little hazy as to the last few hours so he said, "Dean, what happened?"

Dean sighed and could barely look at him as he said quietly, "When we brought you back, it kinda felt like your whole body was on fire. We took your temperature with a meat thermometer after the first one sort of exploded and you're running at 195 degrees. I don't know if that's normal for an angel but when Sam killed Lilith, his was in the 150s. And your eyes, Cas – I can see them from here. They didn't change back to normal this time. They're still all...freaky."

Castiel opened his mouth to say he felt like he was back to normal again when he doubled over, clutching his abdomen in pain. Without thinking, he cried out with an ear-piercing shriek and several of the nearby trees fell to the forest floor as if they had been blown by a powerful wind.

Dean reeled and Sam moved as though to help but Dean held him back.

Castiel cried out again, not loud and more humanly this time and whimpered at the end of it with unshed tears in his eyes. He didn't want to be alone right now. He looked up through the flames at the Winchesters retreating forms before laying his head on the dirt and shifting to lie on the ground, on his side, in a fetal position.

Dean pushed his brother back into the house where they were met by Bobby's ghost at the door. The being sighed, taking off his baseball cap he wore even in death, scratching his head as in older days and replacing it.

"You boys had better hit the books. At this rate, how long do you think he'll be able to hold back?"

* * *

><p>Castiel was drifting off again when he felt air blowing on his face. He opened his eyes and sitting just outside of the holy fire was Lucifer crouched on the floor, blowing at the flames. It took Castiel a few seconds to realize that the flames were parting, allowing him the chance to escape.<p>

"How is it...? How...?"

"Do you remember my brother-son Azazel, Castiel?" Lucifer asked before blowing again.

Castiel didn't bother to respond as he sat up and removed dirt that had latched onto him. Lucifer took the silence as a means to continue.

"Now, Azazel had some _very_ special abilities, one of which being the ability to control fire." Here, he looked Castiel straight in the eye and cocked his brow.

Castiel lifted his hands dubiously and stared at them. In the past, he had used the power of his grace to put out the flames which surrounded Balthazar after he had found his lost brother again. But that was from the outside and an angel should not be able to extinguish holy fire once they were trapped within its confines. Castiel simply thought about the flames going out and lowered his hand as he did so. A section of the fire vanished, enough that he felt its hold on him weaken. Castiel climbed to his feet, took one unsure look at the cabin and ran. He ran as far as he could before another wave of agony washed over him and he collapsed to the hard ground once again.

"Well, well - look who it is."

Not him. _Anyone_ but _him_. Castiel looked up through half-lidded, dazed eyes.

"Heard you were dead. I see that was greatly exaggerated."

Castiel's head lifted from the ground and through clenched teeth he said the demon's name out loud. "Crowley."

The self-proclaimed King of Hell gave his former partner a once over and cocked his head as he let out a slow and deliberate smirk. "You're a bit...different."

"And you're still a worthless abomination - you ass."

"In such a delicate state and still you have a lovely way with words? I have to say I _am_ impressed."

Castiel slowly got to his feet and glared at the other demon, his body slightly hunched over and his hands clutched around his stomach. "Go away Crowley."

"Or what; you'll smite me?"

Castiel doubled over again, falling to his knees. The pain was getting worse. Building…

"I know what's happening to you Castiel, I've seen it before and I can actually help you. Really, all you have to do – is say 'yes' and _just let go_."

Crowley took one step forward and was surrounded by a strange blue-purple light that emanated from the angel's host body.

The light was both warm and freezing and Castiel wanted to tell the demon to shove it. But perhaps... Perhaps Crowley would be able to take this pain away from him. Maybe for once in his measly life, he was telling Castiel the truth.

Castiel felt something shifting in his true form as raised his head and stared in the direction which Crowley had been and whispered as if the word itself was painful, "Yes."

"As you wish."

A snap of the fingers and when the light faded both of them were gone.

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><p>Sam and Dean were strategizing at the kitchen table when Sam looked up to see a weird, deep blue light come from outside.<p>

"Dean!" he said, rising to his feet.

When Dean rose to look, another light erupted from inside of their very room. Unlike the blue though, this one was a blinding white accompanied by a strong gust of wind that blew the papers and books off of the table they were using. When it finally faded away, Dean came to lying on his side on the ground with spots dancing before his eyes.

"I feel like I just got smacked by a two-by-four."

"That was my fault," a new but familiarly calm voice responded.

Immediately, Dean was on his feet, gun at the ready, only to come face to face with - "Joshua?"

The keeper of Heaven's Garden opened his mouth to respond when Sam began to make his own presence known and Dean went to his side to make sure he was all right.

"Dean, what was - ?"

"I am sorry boys," Joshua said, interrupting their moment, "but I do not have much time. Please, tell me where my younger brother is?"

"Younger brother? You mean Cas? He's right outside," Dean said, jabbing his thumb in the direction of the door.

Joshua's eyebrow rose. "Are you sure?"

"Of course I'm sure. Why the hell wouldn't I -"

"Dean?"

In the time while Dean was talking to the angel, Sam had moved to the window and was looking out. He walked out the door and Dean followed him as both of them stared at the charred circle on the dirt with neither angel nor fire surrounding it.

"Damn it!" Dean exclaimed, kicking up a cloud of dirt.

"We must find my brother. We must save him," Joshua said, just before he laid his hands on the Winchester's foreheads and they were transported back into the cabin.

"It was like fifteen steps. We could've just walked you know," Dean said while turning but Joshua was already leaning over the table, examining a book that hadn't been there earlier.

"I believe that I mentioned to you boys that we do not have much time – we have to act quickly. My Father wishes us to save his son and we must move or..."

Sam and Dean exchanged a look.

"Or, what?" both brothers asked at the same time.

Joshua looked up at them with sad eyes. "Or he will be damned."

"Damned?" Sam asked. "You mean...?"

"I mean he will become a creature worse than even Azazel was if we do not stop him in time."

"Worse?" Sam asked at the same time Dean asked, "Well where is he now?"

"I am...not sure."

Dean huffed out a laugh. "Not sure?"

"He is blocked from my senses."

"Well then how can we find him?"

Joshua stood tall which was still shorter than either brother. "I would rather not chance a summoning. I will search for him."

Before Sam and Dean's eyes, Joshua vanished from the room.

"Son of a bitch," Dean muttered, clenching his hands as though he wanted to either punch or destroy something.

"Come on Dean - there isn't really anything we can do right now besides wait and hope Joshua finds him."

Dean glared at his brother for a few seconds before collapsing onto the couch and turning on the TV. Sam sat beside him and reached for his laptop, doing more research on stopping Dick Roman even though his heart wasn't quite in it. It wasn't the best, but waiting was all they could do.

* * *

><p>We're nearing the end of the story folks There's also only a few chapters left - will things get better? Thanks very much for reading everyone. See you in another week. :)<p> 


	14. In the Town They're Searching For Us

Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural. This story only being done for fun.

This time I'm not going to blather on and instead I'll just let you guys read. Enjoy. :)

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><p>It was late at night on the mean streets of New York City, too late for someone to walk home alone, and what Jennifer Holton really hated the most was walking to the apartment in the dark. It was only a five block walk from the diner but, in her opinion, you never knew who was waiting down the next dark alley. She was on the fourth block when she heard a thump in the dark followed by a manly moan. Jennifer knew she had to keep walking, knew that whomever was down there was trouble.<p>

But...

And that was all it took for her to turn back.

"Hello?" she called out, mentally cursing the slight break in her voice.

Each step she took felt like a worse idea than the one before until she finally came upon someone's huddled form beneath the flickering light hanging above a strip club's back entrance. After her eyes adjusted to less light, she could tell it was a dark haired man with his back against the wall, breathing heavily and his eyes clenched shut.

"Um, sir? Are you...are you okay?"

Jennifer took two steps closer to him and he flinched, turning his head slightly to the side so she saw him in profile from the still flickering bulb.

"Sir?"

The man unsteadily got to his feet and the flickering light became even more erratic. As he breathed, large shadows manifested behind his back, huge wings full of feathers that came to points like sharp knives. The man extended his arm, opened his eyes and Jennifer knew she wasn't going to make it home when the light bulb finally exploded.

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><p>There were a crowd of humans converged and talking with each other on a normally busy New York street and that in and of itself was not unusual. A nondescript man walked towards the crowd and tried to see for himself what had happened.<p>

"Excuse me," the man said to the teenager nearest to him, "but can you please tell me what happened this night?"

The teen shrugged his shoulders and said, "Some girl was attacked I think - they said she was all right but kinda shaken up."

"Thank you," the man – actually the angel Joshua, said and after pinpointing the route of her location appeared in a hospital waiting room and awaited her arrival.

The ambulance carrying one Jennifer Holton arrived five minutes later and after a few tests and a questioning from the police she was settled into a room to spend the rest of night under observation. After everyone had left, Joshua appeared beside her bed and gently took her hand.

She awoke slowly as she had been sedated and looked into his eyes and somehow knew the truth.

"You're an angel," she whispered.

Joshua smiled kindly and moved his hand to touch her on the forehead. "That is right, Child. I am."

Jennifer tried to sit up as and said, "That, that thing in the alley - it was..."

"My lost brother," Joshua said, interrupting her. "Jennifer - what happened?"

Jennifer took a deep breath, let it out, and began to speak. She told Joshua about how the man, his brother, clenched his hand into a fist and she felt a terrible pain within her own body while the brother also grimaced as though he himself was in pain too.

"And he collapsed just after I did I think and when someone finally found me and the ambulance arrived he was already gone."

"Did he say anything to you at all?"

"No, sir."

Joshua nodded and ducked down to give her a kiss on the forehead. "Thank you," he said before disappearing to another place nearby.

* * *

><p>The pain radiating from his body was excruciating but he continued onward. Head bent low and body hunched, Castiel walked through the park in the dark of night and did not come upon anyone until finally a careless young man bumped shoulders with him.<p>

"Watch where you're going," the man mumbled.

Castiel lifted his head and the man made a choking, gagging sound. As the angel stared, the man spat blood from his lips and collapsed into a boneless lump. Castiel began to smile and immediately began coughing himself, the pain becoming if possible even worse.

He fell to his knees and felt a hand lay upon his shoulder. He looked up into the calm eyes of his brother, the garden-keeper Joshua.

Castiel repeated the same words he'd said to Ezekiel just a few short weeks earlier. "I want to make it stop – but I can't," he pleaded. "Stop me Brother, _please_."

Joshua nodded, his grip on his shoulder tightened and they vanished as the young man was beginning to wake up.

* * *

><p>It was still the early hours of the morning and Dean was reading from the laptop from over Sam's shoulder when Joshua suddenly appeared standing in front of them.<p>

Dean stood up straight and asked, "You find him?"

"I have found him. Come - he is outside."

The brothers followed the angel outside and over his shoulder, Joshua said, "I have taken the liberty of adjusting the parameters of the trap you had already prepared."

In the middle of the previously empty clearing, sitting cross-legged in a ring of holy fire, Castiel stared up at the approaching group. Dean could immediately sense something was off about him. Castiel made no move to stand and…was that a smirk on his face?

"Cas," Dean asked slowly, "where'd you go?"

His friend cocked his head to the side, closed his eyes and opened them (they were still marbled) and said with a gleeful mirth that was so unlike him, "I took a trip into the city. I met many interesting people there and I...had a little fun with them."

Sam couldn't help but shiver at the excited way the angel spoke.

"Wow, Meg would be so turned on right now," Dean muttered.

Sam looked to his brother but Dean's face was completely guarded. Closed of any emotion and that could mean only one thing – .pissed.

"Is this still Lucifer's doing?" Sam asked.

"No," Joshua answered, "this is the evil of the Fallen One's Cage manifesting."

"So how're we supposed to help him?" Dean asked.

Joshua looked down at his feet for a second before up again. "This will be a very delicate procedure and my Father asked that I go through it alone, but..."

"But?" the brothers asked.

"But - I believe one of you would be able to help."

"Obviously you hardly know the Winchesters at all then, _Brother_," Castiel commented while trying to hold back laughter.

"Shut up, Cas, just shut up," Dean said while slicing his hand through empty air. "We want to help you!"

"Help me?" Castiel said, smiling even wider, looking insane and getting up on his feet. "I think you and your brother have done more than enough _helping_ me. I've never had so much _help_ in my entire existence spanning over a millennia."

Dean shook his head and looked back to Joshua. "We're in."

Joshua nodded and waved his hand. The flames surrounding their friend extinguished and they finally got a good look at the spot where Castiel was sitting. He was in the center of an expertly, intricately drawn pentagram.

"That's a devil's trap..." Sam said.

"Yes," Joshua said, now waving his hand and making a small section of the trap vanish. He walked forward, grabbed Castiel by the arm and led him back towards the house. Sam looked to his brother but Dean wasn't in the mood to talk right now.

"Let us begin," Joshua said after everyone had walked inside.

Joshua walked away to either gather some supplies or attempt speaking to his Father about what must happen next which meant leaving Sam and Dean alone with Castiel.

"Sam? Dean?"

The Winchesters turned, both of them crossing their arms against their respective chests.

Castiel was looking down at his hands and finally spoke without looking them in the eyes.

"I am sorry about how I spoke to you. I do not understand why those words came out of my mouth and in such a tone that I have never spoken to anyone."

Castiel licked his lips and finally looked up. With sad eyes, he whispered hoarsely,

"I am frightened and do not want to become like my fallen brethren in the depths of the pit."

Sam looked ready to believe him but he still looked to his brother. Dean lifted his chin and said,

"I believe you, Cas."

"Then will you let me leave?" Castiel asked next.

Dean shook his head. "No."

"Dean – I believed that we were friends."

"We are Cas," Dean answered, "and that's why I can't let you out of here. Sorry."

"You cannot hold me here, Dean," Castiel said, looking up with a half smile. "You are not powerful enough."

"Maybe," Dean said, "but your brother is and let's just say I trust him more than I trust you right now."

"We will see, Dean," Castiel said. "We will see."

* * *

><p>Two more weeks of posting which means there are only two more chapters left and the next one is going to be the big fight to save Cas (which I've had way to much fun writing a dark side for him). Will it work out? You'll have to wait and see. Thanks very much for reading. Please drop a review to let me know what you think.<p> 


	15. And the Jailer Man and Sailor Sam

Disclaimer: I do not own any portion of the Supernatural franchise. This is done purely for amusement and I making no money for having written this piece.

The big chapter is finally here guys. I debated about splitting it in two but I felt you deserved a long chapter for once. I hope you enjoy it. Any mistakes are my own and I am sorry. (lol, I'm listening to Band on the Run while doing this)

* * *

><p>Joshua waved his hand and a new devil's trap appeared on the floor beneath the transforming angel before anyone could even blink.<p>

"You believe this will work?" Castiel asked, trying to walk forward but was blocked by an invisible, nonexistent wall.

"I believe it does," Joshua said before turning back to the Winchesters.

"What do you need us to do?" Dean asked, glancing at Castiel from the corner of his eye, watching as he watched him back.

Joshua looked him in the eye and said, "I will need for one of you to come with me inside."

"Inside, where?" Sam asked tentatively.

"Inside of Castiel," Joshua said, now turning and looking at him, "We must travel into his very being to remove the darkness before it is too late."

"And it's not too late already?" Dean asked in disbelief.

"His light, his grace, still exists but it is becoming fainter by the moment. Got to work quickly."

"And you only need one of us to come?"

"Yes."

"And the other one...?"

"Must remain behind to watch over him. Make sure he does not escape or worse."

Sam looked to his brother, ready to volunteer to stay when Dean surprised him by saying,

"I'll stay behind with Cas."

"You will?"

Dean shrugged and looked down at his feet but didn't volunteer his reasons. Sam opened his mouth to say something else but Joshua spoke instead.

"Sam, if you'd please..."

Dean gave his brother a hard slap on the shoulder and remained in place while Sam moved to stand beside the angel. Joshua stepped one foot and then the other over the circle of the drawn trap. Sam followed and the minute he was on the other side, flames sprung up from the ground trapping all of them. Castiel rushed towards them to attack but Joshua quickly placed the palm of his hand to his forehead, grabbed Sam by the shoulder and said something in a loud, booming voice. A bright, white light sprung up from the center of the circle and Dean quickly shielded his eyes. When the light was gone, Dean looked and Castiel and Sam were both lying unconscious in the circle, Sam's foot just barely touching the flame. Joshua was gone entirely.

"Take a seat, boy. They'll probably be awhile."

Dean turned and Bobby was standing to his right. Nodding, Dean went to the kitchen, grabbed a chair and planted in front of the fire and waited.

~0~

Sam came to awareness feeling disoriented but someone laid a hand on his shoulder and he calmed enough to open his eyes. Joshua's face loomed over him, obscuring the sight of a daytime blue sky dappled with clouds up above.

"Sam, are you all right?"

"I...I think so." Sam mentally took stock of himself and everything felt okay. "Where are we?"

Joshua stepped aside and Sam sat up and looked around. They were in a place surrounded by lush green trees and wildflowers of all colors. A few lone birds were squawking as they flew by and even a lively swarm of bees passed just over Sam's head, buzzing loudly as they went. It was a garden - the most beautiful garden Sam had even been in, in his life.

"Come Sam," Joshua said, helping the young man to his feet, "we must not waste any time."

"Cas is around here somewhere?"

"Yes," Joshua said, surveying the area with sharp eyes. He walked off in a random direction and Sam knew he had to follow.

~0~

Dean was up to his third issue of _Motor Trend_ when he heard the first sounds of consciousness coming from inside of the circle. He stood up and walked closer to the flames to see Castiel with eyes wide open and, shockingly, their regular old blue.

"Cas," Dean tentatively asked, "you okay?"

The laser-sharp focus the angel placed on him let Dean know that it was the real Cas staring at him and not his on-again, off-again demonic evil twin.

"Dean…" Castiel had never sounded so tired, so…defeated and Dean's heart broke just a little more to have even heard it.

"It's gonna be okay Cas."

The angel maneuvered to his knees and nudged against Sam's large, unconscious body at the very edge of the flames of the holy fire.

"Dean," Castiel said, now looking him in the eyes again, though squinting as if in pain, "what is happening?"

"Joshua…he and Sam are sort of helping you right now."

"Helping me? How?"

Dean wasn't sure how much he should say. "Just wait and see."

"Dean?"

"What Cas?"

"Can you…let me out of here?"

Dean was immediately on his guard. "Sorry Cas, not this time."

"Dean," Castiel said threateningly, his eyes changing back to marbled, "let me out."

"No – can't do that." Dean watched the struggle in Castiel's eyes as he tried to figure out some way to exit but was stymied at every turn.

Not having anything else to do, Dean returned to his seat and his magazine, ignoring his trapped friend and every instinct that screamed at him to let him go.

~0~

"So we're in Castiel's mind?" Sam asked again as he struggled to keep up with Joshua's long strides.

The other angel stopped suddenly and held out a hand so Sam would not crash into him.

"What is it?"

"We are nearing...something."

Sam moved his head from side to side, saying, "Something like...?"

"Well, well," a familiar voice said from ahead, "look at what the angel dragged in."

Sometimes Sam still heard his voice in the dead of night and was grateful that it was just his imagination. The duo rounded a corner and, leaning against a tall oak tree, was the form of Lucifer.

"Hello Sam," the fallen angel said pleasantly, "nice to see you again."

Sam shook his head and shut his eyes. "You're not really here. You're not..."

"I am sorry Sam," Joshua said, "but he is."

Lucifer cocked his head. "Joshua," he said seriously.

"Lucifer," Joshua said back.

Lucifer walked away from the tree and casually passed right by them. He stared upward at the too blue sky, directly into the shining sun and back down again. "You're not going to be able to help him. He's _mine_ to play with now."

Sam made to move forward but again Joshua held him back.

"You are wrong, Brother. We will save him because that is our Father's will."

Lucifer turned, snapped his fingers and Sam was in a world of pain.

~0~

It was just after one o'clock and Dean was settling down in the kitchen area to eat a ham sandwich he'd made when he heard something. It was hard for him to place it but…it sounded like laughter. Bringing his lunch with him into the other room, Dean looked down from the outside of the flames to see Castiel humming what sounded suspiciously like _Knockin' on Heaven's Door_ to himself and chuckling about whatever.

"Something funny, Chuckles?"

"Perhaps," Castiel said, his voice mirthful.

And a second later black demonic smoke poured in through the nearby window, shattering it. It circled around the room and Dean and then flew directly into the flames. A screech that sounded like a scream resounded in the air but when it faded, the flames and demons were gone and the trap was broken.

Castiel smiled as he slowly sat up looking down at his hands as Dean was suddenly forced painfully against the nearest wall telekinetically, making him drop his food. Castiel stood up and calmly walked out from the trap and stopped in place.

~0~

A second too late, Joshua raised his hand and a ring of holy fire surrounded Lucifer, trapping him in place. Sam had meanwhile doubled over, retching blood into the green grass.

"Sam, Sam – it is all right. Sit up."

Sam took a gasping breath in and turned to his former tormentor. Lucifer glared at both of them through the flames before saying, "Meh," and shrugging his shoulders. "You're never going to make it in time. Castiel _will be mine._"

"We will see about that," Joshua said, holding onto Sam and taking off.

Within seconds they were in another part of the garden. Back on his feet, Sam stood in place and gazed at the nearest flowers, still not believing that all of this beauty was inside of his friend's head. Where did this place exist? It was a side of Castiel that they had never seen before and which he would never in a million years say a word about to his brother. Dean already called him a 'baby in a trench coat' – this would just add more fuel to the fire.

"Come, Sam," Joshua said. The angel barely walked three feet ahead when he vanished without a sound.

"Joshua?" Sam asked, turning in a small circle."Joshua?"

~0~

Sam's body shuddered on the floor but Dean's eyes were still focused on his best and only friend.

"Cas – you okay?"

Castiel shook his head and came out of whatever daze he'd fallen into before walking forward again and crowding in Dean's personal space. He stopped before the hunter and put his arms up on either side of Dean's head and just stared at him like always. He squinted his eyes as he studied Dean's face and said seriously,

"I don't enjoy hurting you, Dean."

Dean watched stupefied then as Castiel's right hand moved and grabbed him by the throat, choking him just enough that it was only mildly irritating and obvious he wasn't using his full strength. And just as suddenly as he'd grabbed him, Castiel let him go. He turned away as if to leave only to stop when Bobby's ghost blocked him.

"Going somewhere, Feathers?" the ghost asked, crossing his arms.

"I never enjoyed the way you called me that."

"Is that true… _Feathers_?" Bobby asked, moving a step forward.

Castiel stepped back in order to find another way out. He then turned back, cocked his head off to the side and said solemnly, "I am sorry about your passing."

Now it was Bobby's turn to be confused. He wasn't sure if the angel was trying to distract him or if he was speaking the truth. "I thought angels couldn't feel human emotions."

Castiel didn't say anything but noticed Bobby looking at something over his shoulder.

"Cas, we hear you," Dean interrupted, "We're doing this to help you."

Castiel turned and in the short time he was distracted by the ghost, Dean, with knife in hand, had drawn a small devil's trap on the wall in his own blood. Castiel attempted to move forward but was once again blocked.

~0~

Ten or so minutes passed and Joshua still had not reappeared. Sam passed around a weeping willow and when he turned and looked behind him, there stood Castiel. He was wearing his usual suit and trench coat getup and didn't look very out of the ordinary except that his head was bowed down and his shoulders were slumped.

"Cas is that you?"

"Sam?" the angel whispered back, so low Sam had barely heard him.

"Yeah, Cas, it's me," Sam said as he walked closer to him, "you okay?"

"…Sam?" he said again as if he hadn't heard him speaking, still looking down.

"Castiel?"

A glowing drop of something landed on the ground from Castiel's left hand. As he began to lift his head, the figure fazed away like a ghost and Sam was alone again.

"Cas!" he shouted to empty air.

He was about to yell out again when a hand landed on his mouth, silencing him. Sam looked down slightly and was glad to see that Joshua had returned from wherever he'd disappeared from.

"I am sorry about that Sam," he said, removing his hand, "What has happened?"

"I saw Cas – at least, I think I saw him."

"You saw him?"

"Yeah a second ago. He didn't really answer me when I asked if he was okay and I saw something drip off from his hand."

"Where?"

Sam walked to the spot and Joshua followed as they looked down at the green grass to see a small drop of what appeared to be liquid silver light. Joshua touched a finger to the liquid and rubbed it against his thumb.

"What is that?" Sam asked.

"This is no good," Joshua muttered to himself. "We must hurry, Sam. Come."

He grabbed Sam by the arm and transported them to another part of the garden where in the distance a man in a red sweater was flying a kite. Sam opened his mouth but a shining purple light made him turn and standing just a few short feet away was Castiel, the real Castiel. Sam could tell because the expression on his face was nothing short of agony and despair. His eyes were once again the marbled blue that he was (sadly) getting used to. His body was strangely outlined in the same purple light and Sam was both worried and curious about what that meant.

"Cas," Sam said, moving forward but stopped when Castiel lifted his hand.

"You cannot help me, Sam. It is too late," he said hollowly, looking down at the ground again.

"Cas, no," Sam said, shaking his head, "you can still be saved. We can save you."

Castiel looked up and walked towards them.

"Be ready," Joshua whispered.

Sam looked down at the other angel confused. "Ready for what?"

Castiel grabbed Sam by the neck and held on just tight enough that it was uncomfortable. Joshua stepped behind his brother, grabbing him by the shoulders but the strange light that radiated off of him pushed him back a few feet. The light around Cas suddenly began to pulsate.

"Joshua?"

"I am fine," the angel said, getting back on his feet.

The next time he attempted to grab Castiel and the strange light surrounded him, Joshua released a power of his own to counter it and he was able to hold on enough so Cas let go of Sam.

"Sam, please listen to me very carefully," Joshua said, throwing Castiel to the ground and lighting up a new ring of holy fire/devil's trap to hold him. Joshua handed Sam his own angel blade and very clearly said, "The only way to truly save Castiel's life is by stabbing him with this blade."

~0~

"Bleeding for me again, Dean?" Castiel asked.

"Dude, we are trying to _save your ass!_ This isn't you Cas. None of this is you."

Castiel continued struggling to escape when suddenly it appeared that something pushed him over and onto his knees.

"Cas?" Dean asked, almost rushing forward. "_Cas?_"

Castiel's eyes zeroed in on Sam, still lying unconscious on the floor and he whispered,

"Not him. It's not him."

"Not him who?" Dean asked, more confused now than he was a minute ago.

~0~

"No," Sam said, shaking his head and refusing to look at the knife, "I won't. I can't."

"But you must. It is the only way."

"There has to be something else!"

"There is nothing! You must do this Sam!"

Sam locked eyes with Castiel and the angel (yes, he was still that to him) stared back with resignation in his eyes. Sam took one step forward, then two, then three. He raised the blade above his shoulder – and turned and slammed it into Joshua's chest.

"Joshua was sent here to save Castiel, not kill him. You're what we're trying to stop - an imposter," Sam said through clenched teeth and the creature that took the form of an angel disappeared in a blaze of purple light, the same as the one outlining his friend. Sam turned around and the ring of fire surrounding Cas disappeared.

"Cas – you okay?"

He didn't answer for a few minutes and Sam was beginning to have doubts.

Shaking his head, the angel said, "You should have stabbed me, Sam."

"No Cas, there's always another way."

"I did terrible things to the planet, to my home – I do not deserve your compassion. I do not deserve to live."

"Cas, we've all done serious crap to the universe - myself included. I don't really know why these things always rely on us but, in the end, we always step up to the plate and fix things. You were sort of on your way to that – now you can work on making it better and we'll help you."

Castiel looked him in the eye. "We?"

~0~

Castiel was now clutching his head and his eyes still hadn't moved on from Sam's prone form.

Dean walked over to him and laid a hand on his left shoulder. "Cas, come on buddy – come back to us. We'll fix it. We'll fix all of it."

~0~

Neither one of them noticed the angel coming up behind Castiel's back as they spoke.

"I am sorry Brother."

Joshua's hand sliced through the air and straight into Castiel's back. The angel's eyes widened momentarily before a golden light shined through them. Sam grabbed him as he fell into his arms and they both fell backwards onto the grass. When Sam looked up, it was to see Joshua holding a small, glowing purple orb clenched in the palm of his hand no bigger than a golf ball. Castiel slackened in his grip and laid completely still, his energy completely spent.

"Is that…?"

"Yes," Joshua answered the human, "this is the evil that Lucifer released in Castiel. And yet…"

"Yet?"

Joshua examined the piece closely. "This also contains a small portion of Castiel's own grace that was tainted as well."

"How much of it?" Sam asked, frowning at his friend's face.

"Not a great deal although I believe it will have an effect on him. It will replenish over time."

"What kind of effect?"

Joshua looked at Sam and placed the glowing ball into the pocket of his pants. "We won't know until he awakens."

He walked towards Sam and, smiling kindly in thanks, placed two fingers to his forehead.

~0~

Castiel blinked and the marbled blue disappeared, his eyes once again normal and Dean couldn't be happier for the sight of it. They did it?

"Cas," he said slowly, "is it really you this time?"

"Dea-" he said before collapsing into Dean's arms.

The sheer weight of the angel made Dean fall backwards onto the wooden floor. As he was just sitting up to check Castiel for a pulse, he heard the sound of a scuffling boot. He barely managed to turn his head but based on the groan he knew his brother was back too.

"Sam, a little help here?"

* * *

><p>Just the epilogue is left and I might be posting that earlier than usual (compared to this chapter, it's really short and brings everything full circle). Look for it around Monday or Tuesday. I thank you very much for reading and please review to let me know what you thought.<p> 


	16. Epilogue  I Hope You're Having Fun

Disclaimer: I still do not own Supernatural

Well, here it is - just as promised. Here is the final chapter of Band on the Run. And it's short just like I said. I want to take a minute and thank all of you for reading the story and coming back for more. The story comes full circle and no there are no plans for a sequel (sorry). Although I do have a head-canon as to how the plot for the rest of the season would end and I'm going to post it on my livejournal soon (if you want to check it out - you can find the address on my profile). I'll leave you to your reading and, again, thank you.

* * *

><p>A week had passed and still the angel had not awoken. In fact, Castiel barely twitched in his slumber and the brothers felt like they had no other choice but to wait it out along with him. Until a case appeared in the form of an email from the thought to be long dead conspiracy theorist, Frank Deveraux.<p>

Dean shook his head as talked to his brother. "I don't know Sam...could be nothing."

"Dean it's never really nothing. Not with us."

"Ghost e-mail?"

"Shut up – I'm serious."

After hashing out the details, they came up with a simple, straightforward plan - painting sigils throughout the house to protect Castiel from all that were looking for him. And neither of them trusted Bobby enough to stay watch - though the spirit was adamant about pleading his case.

"I'm still me - I can watch Cas!"

"You're a friggin' ghost first of all," Dean said, "And second, yeah you could - but think about it Bobby - after everything he'd pulled, can you really trust yourself around him? I mean, if there is any one reason as to why you died, he's Patient Zero. It started with him."

And so it was with a heavy heart that the brothers piled into their car and drove off, hopeful that the house would still be standing and their friend would be ready to help the cause when they returned.

* * *

><p>He was sitting under his favorite tree, arms behind his head and his head facing up towards the sun. All was in total silence and he couldn't even remember the last time he was able to enjoy it. No prayers. No Lucifer. Nothing...until the sound of fluttering wings. He opened one eye and before him was his older brother.<p>

"Joshua," he said, rising to his feet.

"Castiel - I am glad to see that you are healing so well from your ordeal."

Castiel felt a smile form on his face, his first true one in ages. "Yes, I am feeling better."

"That is good, Castiel," Joshua said, now smiling too, "You deserve no less."

Castiel licked his lips and took a few tentative steps forward when Joshua spoke again.

"Would you mind if I remained with you for a time? I do so love a beautiful garden and _this one_ is truly remarkable!"

"Of, of course Joshua," Castiel said sincerely, "I would be honored."

Joshua took a seat in the sun and Castiel returned to his tree. Joshua smiled at his brother and hummed an old Enochian chant that filled Castiel with a warmth he hadn't felt since his youth. Everything was fine. Everything was beautiful once again. He was free. The chanting became louder and it began repeating itself. Castiel looked to his side and Joshua was no longer there. The Word became clearer and clearer.

_Prophet._

_The Prophet._

_Find the Prophet._

_Go to him. Protect him._

It was time.

And Castiel woke up to sound of crackling thunder.


End file.
